Quaker Oat Flour

Hi blog fans! I live another day! Just to close the loop on my allergy testing: it was horrible; I don't recommend it to anyone who already knows they have severe allergies and I surely regret doing it. But, as noted, I live to blog on. 

And I'm not allergic to oat (not that they tested it), so this is perfect for baking. But what's this? My local grocery store stopped carrying it, even though they used to stock it, so I had to order it online!? Ew, gross, etc. But order it online I did, because life is short.  This is pricy stuff, at least compared to wheat flour, although if you can't do wheat (luckily I can -- not that they tested it) it might be cheaper than other gluten free flours. But in terms of its utility, it's right there (and it has more protein/fiber which is always good). It must be stated that it tastes like oats. So I used this to make a pretty tasty zucchini oat bar, and I've used it for buckle/cobbler like sweetbreads, and that seems to be the right kind of use case. I also like oats even though I eat them for brekkie every day, so I might not be a neutral oat flour judger. But this is a good product for oat-likers. 

Overall
Cost: 5/10 (6$/bag)
Taste: 6/10 

Quaker Avena Instantanea - Canela

Who knew that switching from a morning bagel to morning oatmeal would eventually lead me to this stressful, exciting, nearly expired cinnamon oat experience from the DR? Scary because: the Dominican Republic is one of like, 8 countries that has literally no allergy labelling law. (Those poor allergy kiddos.) But this has only oats, cinnamon, and sugar, and it has a contiene trazas de trigo, leche, soja disclaimer! Notably, no nuts there. So, even though I'm not super familiar with the ~labelling landscape~, a quaker product with a non-obligatory label seems like a safe enough bet. More mysteriously, although these are supposedly instantanea, the cooking time is 4-6 minutes (whereas the US instant oats has a cook time of 1 (un) minute). Accordingly it also suggests twice as much water(!!) as the US version, which is already way too much. I never use the full amount of water, so I did my usual 2:1 ratio here. And that was a huge mistake. Lol. It was the most extreme shinkydink pasty crust you ever saw. It also tasted so good. Like burnt applesauce, but oats. Like grits but not gritty. The kiddos who don't die from allergies must be living on cloud nine with this stuff. An oatmeal that doesn't feel like a chore? Maybe it was just the slight fear-based adrenaline making me jolly, but I don't think so. These nearly expired Dominican oats are fire. Now how on earth am I gonna get them up here??! 

Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 8/10 

Cap'n Crunch's Arctic Crunch - Vanilla Frost

The reviews for this are so bad... I couldn't stay away. The reviews are correct. I should have stayed away. This tastes like frozen lima beans, which I haven't had in a loooong time, because I am allergic to beans. But lima beans are the only bean I don't miss, because they are mealy and gross. This cereal isn't mealy (it's Kix-texture), but it is gross. Genuinely, it tastes like freezer burn (arctic crunch!) and light vegetable. Very weird vibes. I don't get any "cooling effect", though, which is just about the only good thing you get with these novelty frosty cereals. OK, one other good thing here: the aesthetics of the cream & cerulean orbs are very good and unique. It's one of the prettiest cereals I've ever seen. Like glass orbs in a modern Nordic-inspired home catalogue. Other than bad bean, the main flavor note I detect is "aspirational vanilla frosting (gluten free?)". Like me, its aspirations remain unfulfilled. 

As I did my usual "eating a new food allergy panic attack website google" (parse that one, syntax nerds), I saw that this is no longer listed under available products on the Quaker site (though it is ostensibly allergen free). Smart move, Cap'n. 

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 4/10

Quaker Apples & Cinnamon

I'm not sure why I didn't buy this months ago, since it's packaged & sweet & not breaking any rules. But for whatever reason (health???) I did not. It's no raisins and spice, but that's OK. This is oatmeal with apple, cinnamon, and sugar. Sure, you could make it yourself, but this is not particularly costly, so why bother? Tastes a lot like baked apples (which I am eating a lot of now since I can't have Raw apples). It is pleasant. Pie-esque. The biggest downside is the horrible texture; using 2/3 cup water is not enough, but any more is somehow far too much. It is either gloopy or runny. Perhaps this is just the nature of oatmeal, but I seem to remember a non-horribly-textured oatmeal in my past years ago. Perhaps it is a false memory, like so many memories are.

Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 6/10

Quaker Oats (Quick 1-Minute Version)

I can't believe I didn't review this yet. Back in my peak medication-induced misery (August '24) my diet was essentially just chicken, rice, brocco, and sad, sad oats. These are said sad oats. They aren't even normie oats, because they cook in 1 minute and 44 seconds (yes, "1 minute oats" is a super misleading name!!) and are consequently hella mushy. But I was in such a bad state I couldn't even go to the store, so these are what got bought for me. And I was grateful! (Well, maybe not, hehe. But let the record show that I now am retroactively grateful!) 

The convenience is good, and the nutrition is fair. You can add toppings, in theory, like butter, cinnamon, sugar, fruit. But even so, the taste is not good. It is not BAD, it is simply not good. When people talk about "slop", I say I think of the big brother slop, but I actually think of these oats. That being said, it is a pantry staple that is smart to have on hand, since it is much quicker than rice/noodle/chicken. When I am done with this cylinder I will probably switch to a less "quick" version, though, however that works. (My oat knowledge is pretty minimal....for now.)

Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 6/10

Quaker Fruit Fusion Instant Oatmeal - Strawberry Peach

There was a big Quaker recall recently, which apparently impacted the Capt'n Crunch oatmeal I had last year! But not this. Apparently. Anyway, it was an illness recall and not a nut recall, so I'm pressing on. This flavor smells and looks good - peach! Yum! Real fruit! The taste is just so-so; it isn't super fruity but more of an "oatmeal" flavor. Nevertheless, I like oatmeal and I like the light fruity vibes that are present. So it's a nice warm meal! 

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 7/10

Cap'n Crunch Instant Oatmeal

This is a weird product. It looks kind of like cereal mush when you make it. And it comes with "crunchy topping" which you might think would just be little Cap'n Crunch pieces, but it isn't, it's small orbs that are a little bit like captain crunch but not crunchy. I was so scared there would be PB in this, especially with the red box, but I am still alive as of now. It's a small portion and a weird texture, and maybe I was just super hungry, but I kinda liked it. Maybe I like a little risk!

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 7/10

Quaker Instant Oatmeal - Fruit Fusion Raspberry Strawberry

I work at a Quaker school, so I ought to have positive vibes towards this oatmeal. I don't really, though, because they make nutty stuff and their website says they will label but I don't know if I believe them! I guess I believe them enough. This is a tasty flavor, in any case, although I forgot which is the good way to make these -- add hot water or heat water and oatmeal together? After adding hot water, I can now confirm that that is not the way to do it. Gotta microwave, else the texture will be way off. That said, the berry vibes still came through, and I like that. The hot pink color is a little disconcerting, but it's good for Barbie week anyway.

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 7/10

Quaker Yellow Corn Meal

I don't typically like things made from corn, other than corn itself. But I got this to sprinkle on a pizza crust, and it did the trick. There's lots in here, it's pretty fine (although they apparently consider this medium-grained), and it seemed good and fun. What on earth should I do with the rest, though? Corn bread, maybe? Stay tuned, me. 

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10

Cap'n Crunch's Birthday Crunch Cereal

Happy birthday, O Captain my captain! I always get a little scared to eat Captain Crunch because I know there is a peanut flavor, but the label reads as safe. I also don't like birthday/cake flavored food very much, so I wasn't too keen to try this. But, blessedly, there isn't a strong "cake" flavor at all -- in fact, even though the cereal is orb shaped (like the berries and not the crunch) it tastes a lot like regular Capn Crunch, nice and buttery. Maybe a "lite" version of regular. And there are fun colors, so this is a solid option. I sure do like cereal, even though it destroys my insides sometimes.

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 8/10

Quaker Rice Chips - Tangy Barbecue

These were decent! Quaker rice cakes are pretty tasteless, but also filling and low cal. This was quite flavorful as far as the burnt-sweet-BBQ powder, which I liked, so although the underlying chip was probably bland, that doesn't matter too much. They aren't super duper healthy or filling, but compared to a Dorito or something, I feel better about these. 

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 7/10

Quaker Raisins and Spice Oatmeal

Breakfast of champions! This is my favorite oatmeal, and one of my favorite breakfast foods. There's a solid number of raisins in there so you don't get bored, and the spice is nice too. With a little margarine it's like a dessert! The trick is in adding the right amount of water -- usually 3/4cup or a tiiiny bit more for 2 packages works great for me (yes I eat 2 packages, what about it!?)! It's better to have runny oatmeal than chunky oatmeal, in my opinion.

Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 8/10

Cap'n Crunch's Crunch Berries

This is one of my favorite kids' cereals even though I do get a little (irrationally) scared that I'm allergic to it. The non-berry parts are buttery and good and the berry parts are sweet and like kix berries. I enjoy it very much although I don't know if I could eat too many bowls in a row because it is very sweet and buttery, however it is good for a plain cereal bit especially compared to lucky charms or cheerios.

Overall
Cost: 4/10
Taste: 7/10

Laura says: I like it as a cereal goes. I could do without the berries, of all things, so I think a different Cap'n Crunch cereal would be better for me personally. 6/10