Undercover Dark Chococale + Sea Salt Quinoa Crisps

These are very trendy in the nut-allergy social media space (lol), to the point where they're even being offered on flights (c.f. other delightful nut free snacks that have become similarly popular, like biscoff cookies, stroopwafels, and... pretzels). So I finally checked 'em out. Quinoa is a nice allergy-free grain with a good cronch, chocolate and salt are always delicious, so it's a tasty sweet treat. It's definitely more dark choco than quinoa, but the shape/airiness is fun (like a rice krispie treat x non-pareil hybrid), and there's no legumes. Flavorwise this flavor at least is really nothing new, but if you want a little cronch in your salty pre-portioned dark choco, it's a good option. I will try the other varieties because I want to support such endeavors!

Overall
Cost: 5/10 [6$ish]
Taste: 7/10 

McCormick Cream of Tartar

A pretty unappealing name, but appealing as a baking aid to tart-en things up a bit. It's an acid that comes from winemaking, so we have no choice but to celebrate it. I'm tempted to taste a little, un-baked, but that way lies madness, plus what if it's like flour and could be toxic? So we don't really know how it tastes, but it does the job in blondies, etc.

Overall
Cost: 5/10 [5.50$]
Taste: 5/10 

Signature Select Whole White Mushrooms

So, these were a little bit weird. They are bigger than the whole bella mushrooms, which is good because it's less work to clean & stuff them.  I think you get about 16 as opposed to 24 (which ended up being 14, since I lost 2 to molding). They're easier to see dirt on, which makes them harder to clean therefore. The taste was fine, but the texture was problematic, as they had a stretchy(?) membrane(?) on the top of each cap. What the hell is that?? Like eating a steak. Maybe I got a slightly old batch, but otherwise, back to bella we shall go.

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10
Texture: 2/10 

Guittard Akoma Extra Semisweet Chips

 

It occurs to me that I can make my own chocolate candies and choco pretzels, if I can use nut-free Guittard! Soon I'll have time... until then, I'm noshing on these dark choco chips. They're the small size (i.e. regular chocolate chip size) and would be so good in a banana bar. 

According to Guittard, "Akoma means “heart" in Adinkra, the symbol-based language of the Ashanti people native to modern-day Ghana". More Ghana lore for you. Except Adinkra isn't really a LANGUAGE, chocolate company (although it is very cool). There's something kind of interesting about the choco/coffee naming practices Western companies use, like the more local/specific you get with your branding the more posh (bc foreign? authentic?) your product is. No Akoma Hershey Kiss, you know? But the pink package is pretty. So. These taste like very good dark choco. Not too bitter. Dairy free for my dear dairy allergy friends out there. 9 servings. Good. If I had a heart, it'd be a little fuller. 

One more thing: what in the heck is "extra semiweet"? I genuinely don't know if it's extra-semi or extra-sweet. I guess extra-sweet given the world knowledge that the dark choco snobs stick to 80+%, and this is pretty sweet for dark choco therefore, but I wouldn't say EXTRA in any particular direction. Very odd little modifier. And it's not extra chips, either!! 

Overall
Cost: 4/10 [10$ish]
Taste: 6/10 

Ocean Spray Cran x Watermelon Juice

Hmm. This has sugar added, but sometimes a sweet drink is OK. Unfortunately, I'm just not in the mood for it. I think watermelon juice on its own (which is really fun and good and probably goes with sugar) or cranberry juice on its own (which I wish to be unsweet) would both be better than this slightly bitter watermelon combo. At least it is just a small bottle, 100 calos and a little snack. Less sugar than a smaller martinelli apple juice, even! But at the same time, it's giving liquid medicine if you mouth-squint. So. 

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 5/10 

Family Brand Carrots

If they ever make an AI of me, I assume it will just review different brands of Canadian carrots. Here's yet another one. Family brand is not a great name. If one person can be a family, which I have to assume they can, then isn't every brand a family brand? Anyway, these tasted like carrots. 5 in a bag, no issues. I don't have any other food because it snowed again and the state was on Driving Restriction. Alas. Maybe next week. 

Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 6/10 

Prego Parmesan Basil

Occurs to me that there are a lot of sweet things I don't like for being sweet. Maybe I'm internally inconsistent. No, no, couldn't be. Anyway, this is one such. It's also not on the Prego website (aka Campbell's website), so it's probably discontinued, nearly expired, and bad. Furthermore, what IS on the Prego website is a bunch of "protein" pasta sauces loaded with pea protein, which will kill me. This isn't one of those sauces, but the risk of cross-contam or mislabeling is enough to make me hate and fear this, sugar aside. While I'm piling on, it also says "contains 40% daily serving of vegetables", which is so absurd because that can only refer to tomatoes, and as any linguist will tell you, a tomato is not a vegetable. Let's try to ignore all those things for now.

The taste is a little bitter. Like the vomit-flavor of a Hershey bar, so say the haters. I do note the parmesan, but not really the basil. Even among Pregos, it's not a favorite. Plus it's probably heartburn city. Will I finish the jar? Probably. 

Overall
Cost: 5/10 [2.50]
Taste: 5/10