Like Air Drizzled Rice Cakes - Cinnamon Bun

More cinnamon! More rice cake! Gotta get these reviews out while I still have time, after all. So, despite being a different flavor, this is really similar to the Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough flavor. Same overall buttery/sugary rice cake base. But there's a weird flavor note present in these that I didn't notice in the other ones - like a staple, or a cardboard box. Unpleasant. One other (positive) difference is the drizzle on these is some sort of cream cheese frosting deal instead of choco, and it tastes good and goes with cinnamon. There is also less of it, and it's more transparent, so the meltiness of it is less perturbing. I don't think the frosting is the source of the weird flavor. But then I don't know what is. Too bad. Maybe a bad batch?

One other random complaint: the front of the bag advertises that it is "80 calories for 24 pieces", but a serving is 34 pieces (=120calories). Just change your serving size, you freaks. God, I hate that kind of calorie-counter-pleasing ad copy.

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10

Cinnamon Pebbles

Sadly, eating these just made me want fruity pebbles (or even cocoa pebbles). Maybe it's because I eat cinnamon oatmeal for brekkie every day, but this was very generic in taste. The pebbles are a pretty unique cereal form factor - even though they're basically concave maltless rice krispie - but cinnamon is just so overdone. It was fine and all, but not worth your time (and not as good as cinnamon toast crunch, I think). 

Still I almost want to defend it because of this absurd review (which serves to legitimize the insane proteinifcation (via legume) of all my favorite brands):

You are eating a children's novelty cereal, sir!! What is wrong with you! Go eat some spam and eggs! (Also, fact check: it's actually 12g sugar, which isn't health food but is like, pretty standard cereal sugar content.)

Anyway, Post doesn't innovate much, so good for them, and the box art is good. Maybe they'll get 'em next time.

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10 

Jelly Belly - Fall Fireside Collection

Believe it or not, I really am trying to cool it with the jelly (belly jelly) beans.  They no longer have "peanut free" on their products and they're clearly transitioning away from caring about allergies, therefore I don't want to support them with my extensive candy budget (and also, am a little scared). But it takes me a really long time to transition away from things, OK? In the meantime, we can celebrate this hot hot fall day with the new "fireside" collection. Ooh, aah. It's a pretty good mix of flavors for me:

Cappuccino: My true love, coffee. Not really a fall drink, but who cares, eh? Some of them have a bologna aftertaste, however. 7 

Sizzling Cinnamon: Very good. Is there cinnamon coffee? If there were, I daresay it also isn't fall-coded (unless paired with pumpkin, which thank god they didn't). 8 

Toasted Marshmallow: It tastes like marshmallow. Again, feels more winter than fall, but maybe this was meant for those buyers in the frozen north. 7 

Red Apple: It tastes like red apple. Good job, this is actually a fall flavor! 6

Buttered Popcorn: You know it, you hate it... there's gotta be one dud to make the others better. Popcorn is also not fall themed. Jelly Belly, you dorks. 5 

Overall
Cost: 5/10 [3$]
Taste: 7/10

Goetze's Caramel Creams

Rather than disappointing myself by reading political commentary about the college that I don't even work for anymore, I shall disappoint myself by eating this other weird flavor of caramel cream. The inside is dyed red! Why would they do this? The outside is just regular caramel flavor, I think, so that's an upgrade over the pumpkin spice ones. But the inside is a way-too-sweet artificial "apple" flavor, with a weird dense mushy powdered sugar texture to boot. Better than the pumpkin ones, but just because they're more similar to the OG, which might be the only actually good flavor. I'm gonna be too burned out on weird seasonal flavors to ever buy them again though (just kidding, I'm sure). Ay de mí. 

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10 

RITZ Toasted Chips Sweet Habanero

Whew! I'm glad I tried the cheddar ones first, because these are hot/spicy and therefore make my mouth mad numb. But it's just pepper! (I think!). The texture is the same as cheddar, but the taste is quite different. Like a nice pepper jack cheese, kind of. A good bite, and not too "sweet" (thank goodness; that sounds gross). Maybe they're just all broken (or the others were melded), but they also seem to be half the size of the cheddar ones. Again, I must reiterate that these are not chips: they are spicy tomato/pepper/cheese-flavored crackers. Tasty but a little scary. 

Overall
Cost: 5/10 [4.50$]
Taste: 7/10 

Ritz Toasted Chips - Cheddar

These stress me out because there exist PB ritz. But hopefully not PB ritz chips, which is why they read as safe! They also stress me out because the package calls them chips. Are they chips? They are not. They are crackers. But they are weirdly thin and firm crackers. This flavor is like big, curvy cheese-its that have a little bit of Chicken In A Biscuit seasoning. That's autolyzed yeast extract for you, baby! Also garlic, onion, and potato. But while we're ingredient-reading, there is indeed cheddar cheese in there, so at least one thing on the package wasn't a lie. And I guess they're toasted. Unlike me. 

Overall
Cost: 5/10 [4.50?]
Taste: 6/10 

Goetze's Caramel Creams - Pumpkin Pie

Is it pumpkin season already?? Zoinks. Well, I love the OG flavor of these, but pumpkin pie is (predictably) not as delicious. It is very accurately flavored, though! Just like the pumpkin milanos, but in caramel form. The cream bit is like cool whip, even. The overall texture is weirdly softer than the OG (pie-esque?) but maybe that's just because it's AUGUST and not FALL! Or maybe not, but it's less good, either way. The firm caramel is one of the best parts of Goetze. I still kinda feel like I won the lotto getting to try these, though, since they are very rare. Exciting! Limited! Plus there's a strong pumpkin spice aftertaste, which is pleasant enough since I can pretend I just sipped a PSL. 

Overall
Cost: 6/10 [3$]
Taste: 6/10