Guittard 46% Semisweet Chocolate Chips

I should be able to tell that these are less semisweet (lol) than the 55% pink ones, and therefore more fully sweet, but they actually taste the opposite. Maybe I don't understand the chocolate world like I thought I did. I just had a sudden flashback to a girl in my freshman seminar in college bragging about how she was heir to the Scharffenberger fortune, and that they had REAL chocolate, unlike Hershey (with a pointed stare at me, Hershey Girl). I'm no Hershey defender (other than their allergy policy), and I understand the chocolate politics that made her hate me, but that girl was a major snoot. I ranted about it to my parents and they were like, "well, but you can see why she said that." Yes, parents!! Of course!! Anyway, all political discourse is kind of like that for me.

Where was I? Having another 2 Tbsp of wine? No, actually. Not much else to talk about here, though. I like the orange bag. These are a good quality dark choco, and taste very deep and not at all bitter. What is the other 64%? It's sugar. And yet, you can't really taste it. Which is good and bad, I suppose. Lost in the dark depths of the milky (yet vegan) choco. Impressive stuff, Guittard. I bet the heirs to the Guittard fortune are way friendlier. 

Overall
Cost: 5/10 [11$ish]
Taste: 6/10  

2022 New World Syrah

It's really unfortunate that both of my jobs require me to be hyperaware of "the culture" (i.e. the ways people use words in media and conversation) and how it's moving on without me. That is only tangentially related to this wine, but now I'm of the age where 2Tbsp of wine make me philosophical. Very economical. Anyway, it's spring break, so I can imbibe in 2Tbsp of wine. This wine isn't that good tasting. It also made my face very red. Stupid wine. They say it's juicy, spicy, and easy to drink, and arguably just the first two points are accurate. A lot of tannins, though it is bright. More earthy than jammy, but a little jammy. Would definitely go with red meat, but I haven't had red meat in like, 2.5 years now. By philosophical, I may have meant "depressed". Hmm. The power of wine!

Overall
Cost: 6/10 [8$!]
Taste: 5/10 

Oat Haus Chocolate Chip Banana Bread Granola

When it rains, it pours! But this is just unambiguously* good. No weird texture issues; the texture is that of granola and the taste is exactly that of chocolate chip banana bread + granola. A lot of companies start out nut free and then pivot (Built Bars, MadeGood, Brownie Brittle) so I hope that doesn't happen here, because I will actually buy this regularly. It's just oats/quinoa/tapioca/dark choco/banana flavor. Banana is having a moment right now, also. Check out Dunkin's new banana cold foam and syrup! (This is a note to me, primarily, since I can't eat fresh banana due to O-A-S but I do really love banana.)]

*Oop, hold on, there is a weird little aftertaste. A bit artificial. But not too strong... just ignore it... 

Overall
Cost: 5/10 [13$ish? but it's 10 servings!]
Taste: 7/10 

Oat Haus Red Velvet Granola Butter

Granola Butter? What will they think of next!? OK, so apparently this was on Shark Tank (never watched it), and the owner is big on TikTok (never used it), and that tracks to me because the name "oat haus" is right in that annoying hipster space. (It used to be called something even worse, though, so we're getting there). Anyway, I saw this in a store and thought "nut free, eh?" so I got it because I will eat pretty much anything I'm not allergic to, as you've no doubt observed. I have never wanted a peanut butter replacement, since I've never wanted peanut butter, and in fact the idea is actively repulsive to me. But I do like granola, butter, and cakes, so I wasn't sure how it'd go. 

It went....eh. The appearance is pretty nasty -- mud would be generous. I wasn't expecting little white choco chips in there. It's a lot like gritty, slightly whipped chocolate frosting. I do get red velvet cake vibes, so they did a good job flavor matching. I like that you can keep it in the cupboard even after it's open. I must say, my first reaction was disappointment and mild disgust (at the texture, which I imagine is way grittier than any nut butter (??)), but as is so often the case, the more I ate it, the more I got into it. It is extremely fatty, so that makes sense. It's also sweet, but not quite icing sweet, which is a plus. I'm open to receiving more of what "Oat Haus" has to Auffer me. 

Overall
Cost: 5/10 [13$!]
Taste: 6/10 

Two-Bite Filled Carrot Cake Cupcakes

I am a fool to keep buying these. Stick with the original! All these filled cupcakes are bad! Nut free carrot cake product was just too tempting to pass up, though. But I should have passed up. The one upside is, they are slightly less sweet tasting than the last kind (although I suspect nutritionally identical), and the texture is good. There are also actual carrot fragments in the cake (or at least some orange shreddy bit, lol), which I appreciate. But the taste is quite bad. Not cake, not carrot, not sugar, not cream cheese, not vanilla, I don't know what it is but it's not a treat. Tragic stuff really.

Overall
Cost: 4/10 [5.50]
Taste: 5/10 

Undercover Dark Chococale + Sea Salt Quinoa Crisps

These are very trendy in the nut-allergy social media space (lol), to the point where they're even being offered on flights (c.f. other delightful nut free snacks that have become similarly popular, like biscoff cookies, stroopwafels, and... pretzels). So I finally checked 'em out. Quinoa is a nice allergy-free grain with a good cronch, chocolate and salt are always delicious, so it's a tasty sweet treat. It's definitely more dark choco than quinoa, but the shape/airiness is fun (like a rice krispie treat x non-pareil hybrid), and there's no legumes. Flavorwise this flavor at least is really nothing new, but if you want a little cronch in your salty pre-portioned dark choco, it's a good option. I will try the other varieties because I want to support such endeavors!

Overall
Cost: 5/10 [6$ish]
Taste: 7/10 

McCormick Cream of Tartar

A pretty unappealing name, but appealing as a baking aid to tart-en things up a bit. It's an acid that comes from winemaking, so we have no choice but to celebrate it. I'm tempted to taste a little, un-baked, but that way lies madness, plus what if it's like flour and could be toxic? So we don't really know how it tastes, but it does the job in blondies, etc.

Overall
Cost: 5/10 [5.50$]
Taste: 5/10