Orville Redenbacher's White Cheddar Popcorn Seasoning

This past week I've unlocked a new symptom of unknown provenance: sporadic full body numbness and itchy tingling, which, in concert with my general allergy anxiety, has made me kinda unhappy about eating. It's like when your sick kid's only willing to eat ice cream so you give them ice cream. For me, I guess ice cream is this popcorn seasoning. I only gave it a shake or two, so there isn't much flavor to go on, but there's apparently 91 servings in here (1/4 tsp each) so I think I got approximately one serving. I suspect more might be gross, although I haven't tested that yet. The main flavor note is, like, MSG. Not a real strong cheese flavor, although kind of a "this is powder that would be on a goldfish cracker" flavor. Vaguely sweet(?!) and not especially buttery. I guess it's solid. I also had to rewrite about 300 words in this entry, so I think the numbness etc may be a flare of the ol' migraine(/MS/seizures/whatever the heck I've got going on neurologically). I feel like a jello mold. But at least I smell like popcorn!

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10

Orville Redenbacher's Naturals Simply Salted Popcorn

All these popcorns basically taste the same to me, unless it's like a "MEGA BUTTER DRENCHED" variety. This is on the "healthy vibe" side of things, which I guess I prefer, even if not for taste. But the taste is fine: it tastes like popcorn and salt. I guess I kinda like that there is no weird oily butter "powder" htere. The popcorns are pure white colored, which you rarely see nowadays. I wish there was a little bit less in the bag. Act II really spoiled me for that. But if you're starving, this is a good option, even if it's still too salty for my preference.

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10

Orville Redenbacher's Butter Popcorn

Huh. As always, I only bought this type because it was the cheapest brand I recognized, but it really hit on the "butter" sweet spot! The "smart pop"  butter is OK, but tastes like it's the "healthy" version, and the "movie theater butter" was actively oily and gross, but this is decadent, tasty, but not sickening! Wow! I might even seek out this elusive "regular butter" flavor next time. It probably has a lot of unhealthy oils in it, but whatever, it's popcorn.

Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 7/10

Orville Redenbacher's smartpop! butter popcorn

I wanted some "plain" popcorn, which I guess I should have just popped myself, because this is the closest I could find, and obviously it still has some butter/salt/flavoring. It wasn't too strong though, and it wasn't insanely expensive, which is why I picked it. As a base for my homemade rosemary corn and caramel corn, it did the just. Good texture, eh flavor, which is I guess what you want for a base. Very filling snack and quick to make. Might be secretly bad for you though.

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10

Orville Redenbacher's Movie Theater Butter Microwave Popcorn

Real talk, I should not have bought this. At the time, I was looking for cheap calories, but I don't know if it means I'm feeling better or worse that the idea of 23 more bags of this disgusts me. It really is salty and oily and tastes artificial and like it's destroying my body. Moreso than your butter lite flavors, for sure. In a vacuum, if I just had a few kernels, I'd say "yeah sure, this tastes fine, like popcorn", but there's too much in the bag and it doesn't keep well and I just don't know what I was thinking. Dang. Anyway. It pops well, not many leftover kernels and not burnt. They make nut foods but apparently on separate lines in the same facility (sketches me out, but never had an issue myself). I didn't eat that much today but I still could not finish the bag. It's just too much. Maybe I'll portion them out into thirds somehow in the future, or give them to my parents or something. I should definitely stop buying in bulk is the real lesson.

Overall

Cost: 6/10

Taste: 5/10?

Disgust: 8/10

Orville Redenbacher's Spicy Nacho Popcorn

OK, so I like microwave popcorn and I like spicy and I like nachos. However, this smells TERRIBLE. Oh my gosh, it smells so much like spicy garbage. HOWEVER, if you turn your nose away and just eat it, it basically tastes like a spicy buttered popcorn, which is ok. I'll finish the pack in this non-smelling manner, but I will not get this flavor again! However, I will try a new and less spicy flavor soon, because the texture and everything is very good.

Overall:
Cost: 8/10
Taste(&smell): 3/10