Gold Peak Slightly Sweet Iced Tea

No solids... only liquids... 

This tea brand makes me think of my students, because they love to call things "peak". Ah, the youth. It's owned by Coca Cola, but I thought they already had a different tea brand. Maybe they changed names. I'm too lazy to look into this right now, but the conceit of a sweetened-but-not-CRAZY-sweetened tea does appeal to me. It tastes pretty darn sweet though. But I like sweet things. It's only 33mg caff, which isn't that much, so I can drink this if I am very weary but already had a coffee. Not that that describes me or anything. It tastes like iced tea, and it is much better than plain tea (bc sugar) and the sweet tea I sometimes get from vending machines when I'm dyin (bc way less sugar). A good product. I don't really like the taste of tea that much, but this is probably one of the optimal iterations. 

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10 

Twinings Pure Iced Tea

Tea time, tots! When I got this, the outside was covered in red goo (tomato sauce)? But I am too lazy to follow up, so I just tossed the packaging and consumed as normal. Luckily the bags are in sealed foil (36x2), and they're sewed together in a condom-esque fashion. More like sachets than bags, since there is no string with tab at the end. But it's OK, I'm not too good to go fishing in the cup (as evidenced by my acceptance of sauce-covered product). There are two options for enjoyment, according to the website/box:

Enjoy by the Pitcher: Pour 4 cups boiling water over 4 tea bags in a clean heat-resistant pitcher, steep for 4 minutes, remove tea bags. Fill the rest of pitcher with ice or 4 cups of cold water. Enjoy now or refrigerate for later.

Enjoy by the Glass: Pour boiling water over tea bag in a heat-resistant glass, steep for 4 minuets, remove tea bag, add ice to desired strength & enjoy!

Fine, fine. Very fine. I'm only one person here, so I'll start with the glass option. Queuing up my favorite Bach. How was that? Observation the first: there is no amount of ice you can put in a standard cup that will both not overflow and succeed in icing the tea. This is why you make iced coffee in huge tumblers. Anyway, I ended up with warm tea. Observation the second: It tasted like normal black tea. What are we doing here? Maybe I'll try the pitcher later, since that has the benefit of going in the fridge. Also, my head hurts and this didn't help :(

Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 5/10 

Bigelow Premium Tea 100% Ceylon

Ceylon, for those of you who weren't around in the 70s, is tea from Sri Lanka, which used to be called that (until 1972). I am not enough of a tea drinker to have location-based tea preference, so this is your run of the mill black tea to me. It's fine. Actually, you'd think drinking a hot drink on the first 90+ degree day in my house would be horrible, but it distracts me a little from the heat, which is a pro. Just a little. This was another hotel freebie, so it's got that to recommend it also. 

Overall
Cost: 10/10
Taste: 5/10 

Bigelow Premium Tea - Decaffeinated

Thanks to the Ohio Holiday Inn for providing this nice allergy-free tea. The trouble with a travel tea is that I didn't pack a travel mug, so the water can only get so hot given my limited resources. But, if it's perfect hot or iced!, it's probably perfect tepid too. (Maybe perfect is a bit strong). Anyway, this is black tea, my preferred tea color, so it tastes just like all the uninspiring yet comforting teas I've had this past year. Away from home I have plenty of inspiration and not that much comfort, so I appreciate it! Hilton (my usual hotel chain of choice) should take note.

Overall
Cost: 10/10 (free)
Taste: 5/10 (tea) 

Bigelow Perfectly Mint Black Tea

Continuing to play whack-a-mole with health problems... supposedly spearmint tea helps with insulin resistance. But this is the only spearmint tea I'm not allergic to, and it also has black tea, which is caffeine (?bad for brain?). Also, spearmint tea tastes a little like an old lifesaver I left in my glove compartment for 10 years. Mixing it with black tea helps, I guess. It's not the worst tasting tea, but I don't know if it's a great evening beverage, and it's certainly not a morning beverage. It also used to be called "Plantation Blend", which, yikes. Perhaps I'm just in a mood. The tea is fine.

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10

Twinings Irish Breakfast Tea (Decaffeinated)

Often, due to my lifestyle, someone comes up to me and says something totally prescriptive and horrible and expects me to not only agree, but be proud of them. That is what both ends of decaf tea drinking feels like. However, it's not all bad. First of all, it's a hot drink. And of the horrible decaf teas, this one has a nice texture (thick, not too gritty) and a cute little bubbling effect (even when the water is most assuredly "hot enough", for any British tea evangelists out there). I'm not Irish and it's not breakfast, but I sure as shoot am decaffeinated. 

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 5/10

Twinings Pure Peppermint Tea

Moderation is not king. Either eating a single cookie destroyed me, or the stress that eating a single cookie could destroy me destroyed me. Tragically, I still want to disambiguate by eating more cookies, but I can't, because I have a job to (badly) do. So my cookie experiments will wait a few months more. In the meantime, I somehow consumed 20 bags of Bigelow mint tea, so I figured we can get our jollies by trying the Twinings mint tea. They have the same ingredients ("peppermint") and the same allergy policy (top 9 free), but this one is a cuter box, even though you can't really tell from the picture. It's a nice green. 

How is the tea? You may be shocked to hear that it tastes almost indistinguishable from the Bigelow peppermint tea. It smells a little stronger, though: first like mint (makes sense) and then a little like a bowling alley (not sure what's going on there). I say it tastes almost indistinguishable because I feel it's a little less sharp, with a little less (yes, even less!!) flavor. This is only my first cup, so I should really check back in a month, but for now I think Twinings > Bigelow. Neither brand seems to have any other teas I can consume presently, but I only did a shallow dive into the catalog, so we'll check back later to see what else we can scrounge up to get through the long autumn. 

Overall
Cost: 6/10 [4$]
Taste: 6/10

Bigelow Peppermint Tea

I feel like someone who's hooking up with a bunch of different people with different qualities of an ex they never got over. This one has blonde hair. This one is a poet. This one speaks Spanish. This one is left-handed. But none of them are really what you wanted, are they?! My ex is coffee and this hot little number is not coffee. But it is 1) hot 2) a drink and 3) allergy-free. As well as, of course, being caffeine-free (unlike decaf, apparently (and I guess that's why they don't call it nocaf)). The only ingredient here is peppermint. That's nice and clean. Unfortunately it tastes like peppermint and didn't magically transform into something else via the process of hot water steepage. In terms of taste, I'd put it on a par with green tea. Not good, not exciting, but fine. It has a certain comfort just in being hot tea. And the mintiness is pretty subtle, not gross like a toothpaste or a breathmint or something non-ingesty. In that sense it serves its purpose. But does it bring me joy? Wakefulness? Satiation? Hope? A reason to live? It does not. I guess that's a lot of pressure to put on a drink. I would crumble under that kind of pressure. For now I will endeavor to accept the comfort this peppermint tea brings. Namaste.

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10

Bigelow Green Tea (Classic)

What is there to say that hasn't already been said about Green Tea (Classic)? This was fine. It was a hot drink and it had a marginal (30mg?) amount of caffeine. It is only one ingredient: green tea. I drank it because there were no cofes available. So it goes.

Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 5/10

Pure Leaf Lemon Tea

So, in this extremely frustrating covid-ish era where literally no one else is wearing masks but I still am because I'm not a monster but I also have to teach back to back classes in person in a massive lecture hall with no mic and using chalk which I hate and I have to take a bus to campus after my 2+ hour drive,,,,, sometimes I get tired and thirsty so I buy this from a vending machine on the way to the bus. Actually, almost twice a week. I know it's bad for me (it's basically sugar water with caffeine) but it tastes pretty good, is refreshing, and has caffeine. At least it's probably better than soda in terms of health and taste? :D? I could really use some good news this week, blogfam, 'cause I'm losing my grip. But this tea is solid though, especially when chilled. God bless.

Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 6/10

Twinings Earl Grey Black Tea

I'd say these are OK. They taste like tea for sure, meaning that they make my throat feel a lil funny. It's gritty, you know? Coats the throat like red wine. I got a little citrus vibe here, even though this is just plain (i.e. not the 'lady' version with citrus!). I guess caffeine and a quick steep is good.

Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 5/10

Stash Peppermint Tea

This is nice! I'm not really a tea fan, let alone an herbal tea fan, but this one is probably as good as it gets for me in the peppermint tea space. Nut free, just pure mint leaves, not gritty, quick steep, tastes very fresh and strong. Just a nice, comforting, refreshing hot drink. I'm drinking it in the afternoon because I couldn't decide if it was for waking up or going to bed, and I still am not really sure. I guess it feels cozy. A weird summer drink, but nevertheless, I enjoyed my time with it.

Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 6/10

Twinings Cold Brewed Iced Tea - Peach

I would say: I like it! Tastes like peach tea, obviously not sweetened snapple or anything, but certainly peach > mint for tea, and I think black > green tea as well. Pleasant.

Overall
Cost: 7/10
Taste: 6/10

Twinings Cold Brewed Iced Tea - Mint

Yep, this sure is mint tea all right. A very minty flavor. I suppose this is more fun cold than it would be hot, but nevertheless, I do not love the flavor. Green tea maybe is not for me.

Overall
Cost: 7/10
Taste: 5/10

Twinings Cold Brewed Iced Tea - English Classic

Ice tea...bag?? What a country. I drank this at an apartment that didn't have ice in it (I'm so privileged to have an ice-making fridge!), but it wasn't bad, even with no ice (or sweetener or lemon or anything). Basically this is a less intense/less gritty English Black Tea. Well, apparently this is both black and green teas mixed, but I mostly tasted the black (aka normal) one. This is a fun/good option if I'm in desperate need of caffeine too! 

Overall
Cost: 7/10
Taste: 6/10

Twinings English Breakfast Tea - Honey & Vanilla

This tea was fine. I think I prefer to have just their plain English Breakfast tea, without any vanilla flavor (or maybe it's the honey I don't like). Whichever it is, the flavoring tastes artificial and odd. Otherwise it is drinkable, basically just fine. I was never one for tea anyway. At least it is safe!

Overall

Cost: 6/10

Taste: 5/10

Twinings Lady Grey Black Tea

This is a nice, solid, safe tea that doesn't smell egregiously bad to my sensitive partner :D. It's basically just black tea, but with a little 'lady' flavor aka citrus. I'm not sure what the other natural flavors consist of, but it's nothing I can't drink, and it's guaranteed not to be nuts. So that's good news. The citrus flavor is pretty subtle, but it does smell/taste a little more exciting than the plain black tea. I think it's better than green tea in general too. A good calming (yet supposedly caffeinated, idk if my body is aware of that though) drink before bedtime.

Overall

Cost: 7/10

Taste: 6/10

Stash Christmas Morning Tea

This is a mix of black and green tea, and the green tea is jasmine infused. Jasmine is a flower but I was still scared I'd be allergic to it (you know how life goes). Anyway, this tea was fine - mostly tasted like strong black tea IMO. It grew on me as I became less afraid of dyin'. Nice to have a warm drink, as always. Tea has kind of a gritty feeling on my teeth though, you know? Like spinach. But I hope it has health benefits or somethin'. It was all right. Plain 'n boring, like most of my Christmas mornings!




Overall
Cost: 7/10 (100 for 18$)
Taste: 6/10

Stash Christmas Eve Tea

Not familiar with this brand of tea, compared to Twinings and Bigelow, but both their website and their email indicated that they are top-8 allergy free. So that's reassuring enough, although you never know about licorice and anise (but usually they list these things because they sound classy). This was an herbal tea, which does nothing for me in general, but it had mainly mint and cinnmamon notes. Not a very strong taste, really, but a strong smell (boyf hated it). I didn't die, but I only drank a little bit, and I concluded it was just "OK".




Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 6/10

Pure Leaf Unsweetened Black Tea

This is a big boy jug of iced tea! No sugar, no flavor, just tea (and citric acid). It's nice. I feel totally guilt-free in drinking this, plus it has a little caffeine which I obviously love, and it's a nice cool drink that doesn't come out of my weird sink. Feels a little wasteful to buy when I can surely brew (and refrigerate if needed) some black tea for myself for less money and more environmentally friendly, but since I'm already living off of online packages anyway (and vegan by circumstance), so what who cares. I'll take the convenience. The taste is exactly like cold black tea. It isn't tasty, but it grew on me a lot over this past year (even those pickles I absolutely hate have grown on me lol), so now I actively enjoy it. Yum, cold tea! And no weird add-ins like licorice or anise that I'm allergic to! Thanks, Pure Leaf!

Overall
Cost: 5/10 (About 3.50$)
Taste: 6/10