Oscar Mayer Classic Beef Franks

So let me be "frank" with you -- I wasn't looking for a beef frank. I wanted a turkey dog, a chicken dog, or worst case scenario, a part turkey dog. But the only one of those at my store were nearly expired long turkey dogs at twice the price. Disgusting. So I got these, even though they're shortening my lifespan as we speak. At least they taste fine. All these franks frankly taste the same to me. I don't know why, but when the semester winds down, I yearn for a hot dog. Now I have 10!

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 7/10

Jack Link's Beef Tender Bites - Teriyaki

I thought I was buying regular old beef jerky, but I accidentally bought these "tender bites" instead! They seem like they'd be a weird texture, but actually they just taste like regular old beef jerky, in a more conveniently consistent piece-size. Not too bad. I would unaccidentally buy these in the future.

Overall
Cost: 4/10
Taste: 6/10

Vermont Smoke and Cure - BBQ Beef Sticks

These were good, even though they're beef and not pork, they tasted like a cherry ham slice. A little mild BBQ smoke flavor too, I guess? Overall a solid filling snack, like mosta these VSC bad boys.

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 7/10

Jack Link's Teriyaki Beef Jerky

Turns out my grocery store sucks, so I'm still buying a lot of stuff online. Endless quarantine life, baby (except that I have to teach in person). The little bags are pretty convenient protein, and decently filling for only 70 cals. The flavor is a little bit like beef teritaki, which is good, but the texture was pretty unappealing - kind of soft and mealy. The sodium and sugar stats are also not great, so maybe it's for the best I don't buy these too often.

Overall
Cost: 4/10
Taste: 6/10

Jack Link's Original Beef Jerky

Aww, look at these cute little jerky bags. I must say, these taste very similar to the Teriyaki flavor. I guess that's beef + soy sauce for you. Maybe these were a little more enjoyable because I knew what I was in for, having eaten them second of the two flavors. I still wish the tiny little pieces were bigger though, even in a mini bag. 

Overall
Cost: 4/10
Taste: 6/10

Vermont Smoke & Cure Original Beef & Pork Stick

Hard to find meat without leaving the house, but this big pack of meat sticks came through for me. The texture isn't tough or chewy at all, with just a little bite. It's a tiny bit spicy but otherwise honestly not super flavorful. Tastes more like pork than beef, but it is subtle. Most importantly, they are Top-8 free, so no nut risk and no soy filler either. That's huge for my piece of mind right now, and so even though these aren't amazing, they are portable safe meat, which is amazing enough for me. Although the aftertaste of spicy is kind of nice!




Overall
Cost: 5/10 (A little over 1$/stick, which seems decent but is pricier than other snacks of course)
Taste: 7/10

Country Archer Beef Jerky - Mango Habanero

Mmm, OK! So, the positives: the packaging doesn't say anything sexist about manbuns this time, which is great. It's also only ~160 calories for a filling feeling meaty snack. I also enjoyed the flavor waaay more than the other one I tried. This one was spicy but not too spicy, and a tiny bit sweet but not at all in a gross or bad way. I mostly tasted spice with a wee bit of mango and beef. That was nice.

The negative here is the texture. It's so mealy and chewy and hard all at once somehow. This is definitely the worst texture of jerky I've had. I wish it were either softer/MORE chewy, or firmer/MORE crunchy. but it's truly the worst of both worlds, texture-wise. The bag also doesn't reseal, but it's not very big so that's OK. So I didn't hate it, but i wouldn't get it again because of the texture (unless it was SUPER cheap I guess).

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 5/10

Lee Kum Kee Panda Brand Ready Sauce for Korean BBQ Stir-Fry

Dude. Dude. Dude. OK, so if you've read this blog or know me in person, you probably know that since the age of 12 or so, when I got seriously diagnosed with NUT ALLERGY BAD NUT ALLERGY, I've been on the quest for nut-free Chinese food. And not crap Chinese food, but stuff that actually tastes like the (takeout) Chinese food of my youth. However, I have been mostly unsuccessful (mild success came with Yoshinoya Beef Bowl's fried rice (RIP West coast life) and this frozen Innovasian chicken and broccoli meal, but after many attempts, I've generally come up short. Since I am usually in search of (Chinese) lo mein or fried rice or chicken and broc, I never would have thought to try this packet of Korean BBQ stir fry sauce on my own. However, blessedly, it was sent in my monthly Degustabox (fun food sub box). First downer: I have to buy meat, onions, and veg if I want veg. So this is a commitment. Then I need to marinate the meat for two hours. Whew. And they say to buy "flank steak", and I'm not very familiar with cuts of beef, being a mostly poultry-only girl left to my own devices. The only flank steak is over 10 bucks a pound at my store! Good lord! But, since the only potential alternative (London Broil Top Cut) looked really different, I bit the bullet and spent the 10 bucks for this meat, then came home and made rice and cut veg and marinated it up and stir fried the heck outta this thing! (The cooking itself took less than 10 min, which was crazy, and I don't have a meat thermometer so I was a little scared and did it on the longer side, like 8min total). And...and....it tastes EXACTLY like the beef teriyaki I used to get as a kiddo! Chewy beef pieces skewered with a wooden stick. Now as a kid this wasn't my favorite Chinese dish, my parents always ordered it, but damn if it didn't bring tears to my eyes to taste a so similar thing!!! I think it must be partially the cut of meat (damn you, beautiful chewy 10 dollar meat), but the sauce is also a really similar flavor, and it's just really great to have this. Ahhh. I think it came out well; even though I used a little less meat than called for and so I had a fairly saucy dish, when it's over rice it isn't too overwhelming or too sweet or anything like that at all. Just great. What a fun surprise! I might have to buy this again, even given the expense, maybe to make for my loved ones (i.e. parents and bf (separately)) to get their reaction. Woo! Cooking success high! :)

Overall
Cost: 3/10 (about 3$ for the sauce, which is OK, but see my meat stress above -- though I'm sure you can use other meats or veg or something instead)
Taste: 9/10 (as a meal, the sauce on its own didn't wow me, although it is good)
Nostalgia: 10/10