Something very good (and certainly better than wines and poptarts) is Toast. I had this bread before in its thin-sliced guise, and I liked it, but more of a good thing is perhaps even better (or I got a fresher loaf). This is the canonical size and shape of bread, it has a good heft, it's got a good stat profile, and it's nut/seed/legume-free. Hooray!
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 7/10
Yay!! Normie bread! This is scary because look at it (looks seed-y), but it's truly just wheat. No flax, no sunflower seeds, no rye, no legume protein, not even a sesame warning. It isn't weirdly big like their farmhouse bread, it's just a modest sandwich-sized slice. The taste is not sweet at all, the texture is a little dry but fine, it goes great with butter, I am so happy about this bread. Yay.
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 7/10
Continuing my Old Tyme adventures... this is another sesame/nut/soy flour-free roll option from Old Tyme. What makes it "game day" and/or "premium"? It's the same calorie and protein info as their regular roll, but it has a line down the middle. It's also a little fluffier/firmer. OK, fine. Mine were 1 week from expiry but had some weird black flecks on top (mold?!??!) which I peeled off, but maybe that's supposed to be there, but probably not though. They also made me flushed and itchy like the high-protein ones did, but is that just anxiety or do I have a secret wheat protein allergy and/or there's unlabelled legume? Being real, I think it's probably the first thing. I'll report in after having a few more. [Reporting in: yep, it was transient.] Taste-wise, these are NOT weirdly buttery like the non-game-day rolls, which is a plus. But they kinda taste like stale bread mixed with air (not like tasty potato), which is a minus. I guess these aren't potato rolls at all, are they? Dang. I miss Martin's. Maybe I'll go back, sesame be darned. Anyway, no butter, bad texture, no sesame, play ball!
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10
I randomly got this in my weekly veg box, even though I didn't order it, it's clearly not a veg, and it wasn't even listed on the website as an add-on option. Did a delivery person just drop in their own shopping by accident? Is it an elaborate plot to poison me? Or, more likely, was it just a weird coding error? Banking on the last one I decided to try it, since I'm not allergic (per the label, anyway), and I've been getting Old Tyme buns. I do love a gamble.
It tastes like normal wheat bread. This is a good thing, by the by. No weird stuff, no corn syrup, no seeds, normal texture (fluffy), not buttery, huzzah. Tasty plain with butter. However the ingredients on the bag do list "wheat protein isolate" (which I'm not allergic to, it just stands out because Protein Isolate), and none of the Old Tyme breads online do... and this is bread, expires within a week, so it's not like they're slowly transitioning the packaging, right? But, maybe they made a lot of extra bags or something and that's why they're mystery dropping them in veg boxes. The crust also tastes a little like rye, though there is no rye in the ingredos (online or in real life). Lowkey stressful but a solid bread that I would buy in an official store now that I've tried it in a shady unofficial capacity (assuming, as always, that I survive). :)
Overall
Cost: ???/10
Taste: 6/10
A new sesame-free roll appears! These seem like they'd be really good; the size is big and the texture is nice and fluffy. They don't have any weird legumes or sesame, BUT they do have 16g of fiber and wheat protein isolate. The idea of any protein isolate makes me so itchy, due to my soy-and-pea trauma, and so even though I'm like, quite sure I'm not allergic to wheat since I eat it pretty much every day, these still made me scared I was dying. Classic me. But I didn't die! I ate two whole chicken sandwiches on consecutive days! They have a nice flavor, not too sweet or buttery like some packaged breads. A perfect serviceable option that I'm glad exists, even though the mega protein/fiber is kinda unnecessary. Bready. Lots of dusty flour. What does 647 mean, I wonder? 64 tummy aches, 7 days a week? The area code to call up Old Tyme? Drop your guesses in the comments!
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10
The rare sandwich roll in 2025 without a sesame warning (or copout sesame ingredient)! I bought these since Martin's (while good and nut free) technically contain sesame per the ingredients (even though I think it's basically a may-contain since I have never seen a sesame seed on them), and I probably shouldn't be playing sesame russian roulette. But at the same time, I might go back, because these taste like straight butter. They taste like a dinner roll with a big pat of margarine right on top. They taste like a weird butter-flavored cracker. IDK what's going on there or who this is meant to appeal to. There is sugar in the ingredients, maybe that's what I'm tasting?? Structurally, they are sound, and they look a little wrinkled and tragic (possibly just the bag I got; it was the only one left) but ultimately held up to heavy filling. No mold or allergy concerns, but the product is really not my favorite, flavorwise. Maybe I just need to get used to it. Anyway, grateful this is an option, regardless.
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 5/10
Can you believe I found a store that sold these? Incredible stuff. A pack of 4 minis was just perfect for my 4-day conference needs; one holds a single egg or a single 1/3 tube goat cheese very nicely. Tastes like plain naan, which it is. No allergens, no mold; good as gold.
Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 6/10
Unfortunately I don't really remember how this was, but I ate about half of it, so it must have been fine! The slices are pretty large. No nuts. I like bread but I don't have it often. Maybe I should get more Pep Farm breads.
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 7/10
Despite myself, I like these. I always tell my parents I prefer garlic bread or Texas Toast to Bread Sticks, and I do!, but these are also quite tasty, bready, garliccy, etc. Of course, I also like the Olive Garden breadsticks, which some do not. These are less salty and more garlicy. They are also a little too oily/buttery to handle for my preference, but they do taste good. Huzzah.
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 7/10
I know a 6 seems like a low rating for garlic knots, because garlic and bread are amazing things, but even though these smelled great and tasted good, they have rye flour in, which made me nervous (although I lived). Also, I only got 5, and the box says there are 6. Very upsetting.
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10
If you want to feel like a pioneer woman, these are perfect. They'd be great with wet foods, or gravy or jam perhaps, but just plain they are, indeed, very plain and floury. That's just fine though.
Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 7/10
These are explicitly nut-free, which is really nice, and there's no sesame or weird seeds or grains either. So, I always appreciate a safe bread. I was surprised that you have to make them into pockets yourself, though! I guess I'm a pita n00b, but I didn't expect to have to poke my own hole. It ended looking janky, but I guess it worked OK. They were also pretty dry, but they might just have been old -- there's no date on the package, so who knows. They weren't moldy though, and they held my tomatoes/baco/lettuce/cheese just fine. And were good for dippy egg dipping, also!
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10
My dad likes the regular Martin's party rolls for a holiday dinner, but this was the only kind my store had. Sweet!? Sounds gross, right? It turns out these basically taste the same as regular, so my dad liked them fine. They're also OK with me, but not my favorite bread-side. So, edible, but not my preference. A little too potato-y and not enough butter-y!
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10
Apparently this is a different product than the butterMILK biscuits, although I would argue both versions are butter tastin'. I got these because they were the only flaky layer biscuit in stock for Thanksgiving, and I have no complaints. They seemed pretty indistinguishable from the other flavors of this style biscuit. I accidentally left them in the oven too long (the stress of parents visiting!) but even though they were very overdone, they didn't char or honestly taste bad at all. Good for leftovers too. Delicious, bad for you, easy to cook. Quality product!
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 8/10
Hm. Has Pepfarm always made bread? I trust them with allergens, so it seemed like a good bet to get this fancy looking bread. The slices are very large -- too big for my normie toaster, even! They worked well for a classy grilled cheese, but as I moved into Regular Sandwich and Normal Toast territory, I felt like this bread tasted weird. And it does taste different than normal white bread, for sure -- maybe more sour, like barley or sourdough? It's not sweet, even though there is sugar in the ingredients (and boo to that). I think if you're mentally prepared for the flavor and not expecting potato bread or wheat bread, it does the job well. I might try a different type next though!
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10
Love these not just because they say "nut free" right on the box, but also because they are actually quite good. The texture is impressively non-freezerlike, and the cooking (2 toaster cycles, no defrosting) was simple as can be. The texture was akin to a nice roll at a restaurant, which is a treat I rarely can partake in. I wasn't expecting the onion flavor or soft onion bits in the middle, but it's still good, filling, and goes with eggs. I will get these again if I can, but try not to become too attached as they seem rather rare. Definitely tastier than Lender' s (although pricier and calorie-er too).
Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 8/10
This stuff bakes in 5-8 minutes the same way it takes me just 5-8 minutes to respond to an email. But other than this blatant underestimate, it's good toast. I especially like that they come in a sealable baggie inside, so I can make 1 toast per meal with my noodles. It's a good treat. No real difference between this and the lower number of cheeses -- maybe the bottom gets more burnt? But it's good nevertheless.
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 7/10
Mmm, bread. Mmm, cheese. Mmm, garlic. You can't go wrong with a cheesy garlic bread. This one is pretty delicious, and I like that it comes in a sealable inside baggy, because then I can make 2 slices at a time and get 4 servings of toast outta the box! Convenient. The time they suggest (5-8 minutes) is actually on the low side, 10 minutes is more optimal for me, but that's because I don't preheat (hehe). The taste is very much "cheesy butter bread and garlic too", and the texture is great if you cook long enough, crispy but not burnt and hard. Good stuff.
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 8/10
The name "butter bread" makes me feel dirty, but this is a solid white bread for the times when you need a white bread. It is a little bit "sugary" for my taste, but it's not over the top or anything. Texture-wise, a slice gets crusty/firm really quickly, which I find OK, I guess. The taste is buttery and a little potatoey, but not too weird. Decent overall, and holds up to moist sauces well enough. Most importantly, no nut/seed allergens (except possible sesame cross-contam).
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10
Happy Thanksgiving! These are not really good for dinner rollin', but they are great for sloppy joes, BBQ pork, and other large sandwiches. A very solid product. Although, now that I've had the "slider size", I feel almost like these are too big! At least for solo single girls like myself. But Martin's rolls are just generally good.
Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 6/10
