Pizza Goldfish

Although I have received quite a lot of medical advice in recent months, none of it has been diet-based, which is kind of surprising given past experience with medical advice. Anyway, that means I can sample pizza goldfish with impunity! They're kind of neat; more interesting than all the samey cheese flavors, although they do seem like a recipe for indigestion (tomato paste? oily cheese? a cool little fish logo that I'm supposed to SWALLOW?). But my stomach has held up surprisingly well even though every other bodily organ and system has turned to goo. Must be all those toaster strudels. 

However! Even though these taste more interesting than other goldfish and therefore better, I don't prefer them. I think I have an anti-pizza-flavor prejudice.

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10

Pillsbury Toaster Strudel - Cream Cheese & Strawberry

These seem so appealing on the surface. Back when I could eat a danish, or a cheese crumb pastry, those were top tier treats. This treat is bottom tier. To be fair, it comes at the end of my 'try every toaster strudel in my store' mission, and I'm experiencing heavy toaster strudel fatigue. But even if this were the first strudel subtype, I'd think "there is no cream cheese here! and the strawberry filling is Bad! a waste of a tasty pastry!". It's all true. 

The ""cream cheese"" is actually sour cream and sugar, per the ingredients, which I guess is similar to cream cheese, but tastes only like a pocket of wet air. The strawberry filling is the same as in the strawberry flavor, and I didn't like it. Too strong and medicinal. These do have little ridges on the sides of the pastry, like an empanada, which I didn't notice on the other flavors. That's fine.

To conclude the toaster strudel saga, only apple is worthwhile. There apparently exist blueberry and cinnamon flavors, both of which have potential, but neither of which are at my local shoppe. So perhaps someday we will revisit the toaster strudel mission (but not for quite a while). (It's important to have goals.)

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 5/10

Mott's Fruit Flavored Snacks - Berry

As a fan of the original flavor ("assorted fruit") I looked forward to this fun new experience of berry flavor. But much like with taco bell taco shells, I perceived no flavor difference between berry and assorted fruit! I would think something (else) is wrong with me, except that the ingredients are essentially the same for both flavors, so it's all down to branding and style. 

These are indeed different berry-adjacent shapes and colors, including cherry (arguably, not a berry) and pink (arguably, not the color of a berry). So, I like these a lot, but not in a fun new way, just in a familiar old way. Good texture, pleasant sweet taste. The highlight is that the wrappers now have Spanish/English translations of various Noun-Adjective pairs, mostly animals (gato blanco) and items in the natural world (shiny star). The Spanish includes articles, which makes sense because of Spanish, but the English doesn't, which doesn't make sense from a translation perspective and is why I could never aspire to design Mott's fruit snacks wrappers! 

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 7/10

Taco Bell Hot Taco Shells

If it weren't for the orange color, I would have no means of differentiating these from the mild taco bell taco shell. Of course we all know hotness is subjective, but I didn't perceive any heat or, really, flavor. Not offensive, but not contributing anything to my taco experience.

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 5/10

DeLallo Whole Wheat Capellini

Do I dare to eat a capellino? I do. Actually, I ate about 20, if I had to guess. This is a fun shape after weeks of elbow, and the cook time (3-4 minutes) is extremely convenient if ever you find yourself very busy. They do have the same taste as all the other DeLallo wheat pastas, but since it is so very thin, it hardly has any taste at all. We have a lot in common, in other words. (A joke, amici!)

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10

Taco Bell Mild Seasoned Flavor Crunchy Taco Shells

These were pretty disappointing for me, although a mild taco shell is never that exciting (especially a hard shell). I prefer Fiery Doritos Locos Tacos or bust. But I wasn't allergic to these and I do like tacos in general, so the meal was satisfying but the shells were not the highlight. Alas.

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 5/10

Dad says: 6 I guess. Could really get by with the spice in the shell and plain meat.

Pillsbury Apple Toaster Strudel

Finally! As I predicted, this is my favorite filling so far. See you never, fruity red innards ! That's not to say it's perfect; it's still a little artificial, and too sweet and fragrant for my preference. But definitely better than the others I tried, and I've only got one new flavor left at my store (which I think is just strawberry and cream cheese so I'm not too hopeful). And these are still hard to open the frostings of, still annoyingly sticky. Plus it gave me a little tummy ache, which the other ones didn't really. Maybe just bad luck though! Still the top pick!

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 7/10