Tootsie Pops

I am sick, so right now these sound terrible, but these are a classic candy and nut free too! They're actually quite good, and every flavor is decent, although I think I like the reds the best. Maybe orange is the worst, but still OK. The tootsie roll inside is kind of weird, but it's certainly better than gum (i.e. blow pops) because you can swallow it! Anyway, for a lolly, these are great.

Caramel: My mom got me a whole bag of caramel flavored tootsie pops for Christmas because she heard me mention the caramel apple pop once and got confused! Poor sweet mom. Sadly, I don't like the caramel flavor as much as the "traditional" flavors, but it isn't bad. A nice caramelly taste, but kind of marred by the underlying tootsie roll. Texture is also odd for caramel which I want to chew. But it's OK. 6/10

Overall
Cost: 9/10
Taste: 7/10

2017 Hidden Vineyards Zweigelt

Classic red wine. Honestly, I'm starting to think they really are all the same: volatile from moment to moment, but in exactly the same way. Then again, I might be drrrnk. I brought this bad boy to my parents' house for the Christmas holiday, so my dad had some too. I thought he didn't like it, but he later had a second glass, so maybe he didn't hate it too much (perhaps like me he finds them all equal). At first I thought this was really tart/sour/dry and it made my mouth pucker, but then it turned into a normal red. I enjoyed it with some holiday ham and fixin's. The history is such that this is a combo of two "varietals" from Austria that some doctor combined, so that's fun.



Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 5/10

Signature Kitchens - Broccoli Florets, Parisienne Style Carrots & Cauliflower Florets

Frozen veg are cheaper and last longer than spinach, so I've been rotating them in as my pasta/veg addition, but they really don't taste as good. Just so watery and tasteless. That said, this is a decent mix, and it steams in bag, which is good. They're usually only one dollar, so that's also quite good. The carrots are a little butterier than different styles of carrots, which is kind of fun. Still way too many carrots in this mix for my liking, though. It adds bulk to a meal, which is all we can really ask for. But don't eat this on its own, that's nasty!

Overall
Cost: 7/10 [1$]
Taste: 6/10

Idahoan Roasted Garlic & Parmesan Baby Reds Mashed Potatoes

I actually got potatoes again! They're so cheap and easy and filling, how could I resist. This sounded like the tastiest flavor to me, because I thought it might be lumpy and garlicy like the best mashed potatoes are. However, I failed to realise that fake mashed potatoes probably wouldn't (shouldn't) be lumpy. So they were smooth and not with skin in them, the picture is a bit misleading. The flavor was fine, garlicy and buttery and I guess cheesy. Honestly I could do without the cheese and if I get more potatoes, I will get a cheeseless variety. I put in some mixed steamed veg to make it more healthful, and it worked out pretty decently. 2 meals worth!

Overall
Cost: 8/10
Taste: 7/10

Pepperidge Farm Whole Wheat Hamburger Buns

These are good! They aren't super poofy like the picture, but I'm actually fine with that. They're sturdy enough to hold my massive pork burgers, and the flavor is pleasant but not overpowering. Just a lite wheaty flavor, not too sweet or earthy or unusual. Plus they have a little bit of fiber! I think PepFarm is making a play for my go-to buns - sorry, Martin's.






Overall
Cost: 5/10 [3.50$]
Taste: 7/10

2016 Sidekick Cabernet Sauvignon

Wine is fun, especially in the winter months. I like this label's ethos, even though I'm not sure if they're called Iconic wines or Sidekick. Either way, they use cute comic superhero girls, and I like that. The taste of this was a little bit "generic red" for me, but it wasn't too bitter or tart, and I liked that too. It did have a nice rich cherry flavor, which I'm starting to appreciate more and more in red wines - at least on the first day, by the 3rd day the flavor had started to acidify for sure. Still drinkable though! I thought this was solid but nothing to particularly seek out, in my opinion.

I also paired this with the recommended Chorizo Pork Burgers with Spanish onions and Manchego cheese, which was stressful because ground pork/chorizo never looks done. They were super super filling and fun to make into patties, but I probably won't cook with ground snausage/pork again for a long while. The onions were tasty and the manchego cheese was good, but tasted exactly like the Parmesan Cheese Whisps I had in the past - and it was like 10$ for a tiny wedge, so not really worth it. Fun to try new things though!

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 5/10

Uncle Ben's Ready Rice - Jambalaya

This was spicy! Or more than the other Uncle Ben's rices I've tried so far, anyway, which to be sure is a low bar. It also made my face tingly, but I didn't die so I don't think it was an allergy thing, just a random food/spicy/??? thing. I thought this was a pretty decent rice packet, especially for just 400 calories, 90 seconds, and 1 dollar (yay, sale!). I didn't even add any veg or meat or anything to this, just ate it straight, and it was filling enough even then.





Overall
Cost: 8/10 [1$]
Taste: 6/10

Hershey-ets

Do I only like these because it's like a safe version of M&Ms, a candy I have been denied for too long? Yes, of course, categorically yes. These are what I remember M&Ms tasting like. No malty flavor like in Sixlets, no weird shape or size, just a straightforward copy (but just in red and green colors because they only come out at Christmas, as far as I know). But they're safe! And they're normal! They're also pretty easy to find and pretty cheap, and the lil candy cane is a cute decoration for the holiday season. The taste is just plain chocolate, it's not even that good, but the novelty is huge for me.


Overall
Cost: 6/10 (About 1$)
Taste: 8/10

Deep River Mesquite BBQ Chips

Another chip selection from the Bryn Mawr campus center! These were OK, but not as good as I had hoped. I guess I really like less crispy chips, they're so hard to bite into. Apart from that, the taste wasn't the type of BBQ flavor I like best, and also there wasn't enough of it! (Classic.) I think I prefer a sweeter flavor, or maybe less "mesquite"ness, whatever that means. I didn't get a strong flavor profile, but I also thought it wasn't what I expect from a Herr's or Utz type of BBQ chip.





Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 6/10

Knorr Chicken Rice

This was filling and fine, but fairly boring as a rice side. I expected a little more from this. It didn't have a strong chicken (or anything else) flavor at all. It did have longer vermicelli pieces, which added a little touch of fun to the experience. I added brocco to this and it was an acceptable, if boring, dinner. At least this only requires water and butter (no milk) so it's convenient to make.






Overall
Cost: 7/10 [1$]
Taste: 6/10

Hot Pockets - Ham & Cheese

A single serve hot pocket? Yes, that is what you're looking at here. You know you're in dire straits when you pick up one of these. In my case, I got it at the hotel lobby after a long day where I had no food except twizzlers. So I was grateful for this massively overpriced hot pocket, single serve. I think I just like hotels, to be honest. But anyway, it was really quick to serve, and the temperature of the inside was way better in this format than in the traditional 2-pack hot pockets with the "crisping sleeve". Crisping sleeve is a scam! The temp was good, but the taste/quality was like, not good (duh). But it was food related product, mostly crust, a little cheese type goo, a few ham-esque pieces, no allergy issue, no heartburn, filling, and convenient. A true five out of ten.

Overall
Cost: 6/10 (In this case, 3/10)
Taste: 5/10

Knorr Yellow Rice

I'm usually a huge proponent of all Knorr packets, but this one was just OK for me. In fact, though I recently had the Uncle Ben's chicken rice which I thought was sooo boring, I think this is even less desirable! The texture of it is good, it's nice and wet, which I like, but the taste is kind of funky. I'm not sure what exactly I find odd - maybe it's turmeric, or some sort of pepper, but I don't love it. This was certainly edible, and I did in fact ed it all up, but it's probably my least favorite Knorr rice pack yet! Woe! (I did like that the label was randomly Spanish/English bilingual though.)



Overall
Cost: 7/10 [1$]
Taste: 5/10

Campfire Mini Marshmallows - Fruit Flavored

Fruit flavored marshmallows, huh? I like sweets and these are appealing to look at, with the nice pastel colors. And gosh, they really were fruit flavored, and you could tell the different flavors apart. Sadly, it turned out to be kind of weird for me. I think I'd rather nosh on some regular marshmallow flavored marshmallows, instead. I did appreciate that they were unique and only 90 calories per bag, though.



Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 5/10

Artisan Tropic Plantain Strips - Sea Salt

Even though they sound cool, it turns out I'm not really a fan of plantain chips in general. They're basically like a heavier and oilier version of a plain potato chip, which I already don't love. These particular plantain chips seemed pretty standard within the genre - they're not objectionable on any metric, but just kind of boring and oily for my taste. The texture is also a lot thicker/crunchier than other types of chips, so it's more work to chew and less of a fun, lighthearted snack. The bag looks very healthful though!




Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 5/10

Uncle Ben's Ready Rice - Roasted Chicken

This was OK. It wasn't as good as the Spanish rice flavor, which was a letdown, but it was perfectly serviceable. The real perk to these is the convenience factor - 90 seconds with no added ingredients or prep is a miracle, especially for how decent the texture of the rice is. The flavor was just really bland for me, though, which I guess I should have predicted just based on the picture/ingredients. I was also a little bit sick while eating, so that might have impacted my tastebuds. I added frozen brocco to this, and it was a filling meal.




Overall
Cost: 5/10 [2.22$, which is OK but 2x a Knorr packet]
Taste: 6/10

Annie's Cookie Bites - Chocolate Chip

These lil cookies are much tastier than the gluten-free everything-free cookies I often get from Enjoy Life, although they aren't as tasty as a fresh homemade cookie, of course. Even though they are like a small and slightly healthier Chips Ahoy with dark choco chips, they are still a good, sweet little snack. The flavor is unremarkable, the texture is crunchy but good, the packaging is reassuring about allergies. Not bad.






Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 7/10

Pepperidge Farm Cracker Trio

You go, Pepperidge Farm! This cracker trio is great. It used to be a quartet with gross sesame crackers, and now it's just their 3 classic cracker flavors. All really thick and firm, so good with cheese/dip/toppings but also tasty on their own, for the most part. A classic for the holidays.

Harvest wheat: these are my favorite, as they have the most flavor. They're a bit sweet, a bit savory, like a pillowy wheatable. 8/10

Butterfly crackers: A crowd favorite, these are buttery and light. A good generic base. 6/10

English water cracker: These are hilariously less tasty than the other types, but have basically zero flavor so are a perfect conduit for good spready cheese. I always eat the most of them because they're so plain! 5/10

Overall
Cost: 6/10 (About 4$)
Taste: 7/10

Deep River Snacks - Rosemary & Olive Oil Chips

These were pretty good! They definitely have more flavor than your plain ol' salt and potato chip, and we already know I'm a fan of the company. Even though I generally don't like rosemary, I guess it's OK in small doses, as in these chips, although really I'd call this flavor more "herbs and spices" than just rosemary - I get a real "savory seasoning bland" vibe instead. It's good though, even if it's not my top tier chip choice.






Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 6/10

Taco Bell

Wait, I've never yet reviewed Taco Bell!? I guess I just suck at thinking outside the bun. But I love Taco Bell. It's like Arby's and Burger King AKA my top fast food tier. Everything basically tastes the same, which is delicious, and it's all very cheap. It's also terrible for you, but I feel better after Taco Bell than I do after Firehouse Subs for instance. Plus they have a fun druggie reputation, and are inexplicably always crowded. :D?

Fiery Doritos Locos Taco: I love these! I hate doritos but these are nothing like Doritos. 3 is the perfect meal, and 2 is passable. These are beef/cheese/lettuce inside a salty red shell. So salty but slightly fiery, not crispy taco but actually a soggy taco shell. So good. 8/10

 Potato Burrito (breakfast): This was great, a good 1 item to get, to be honest. Just cheese sauce and potato mainly. So good, so cheap, so bad for your health. 8/10

Mini Scramble Bowl: Fine and cheesy, with a little salsa randomly in there with egg and potato, not as good as the burrito though. 7/10

Cinnabon Bites: Honestly the greatest thing ever, so soft and sweet and good. 9/10

Orange Juice Mountain Dew: A bit weird in concept but to be honest, not bad for a soda. Tastes like orange soda and sunny D combined. 7/10

Cheese Quesadilla: Sadly not as tasty as the chicken quesadilla, it was overall just kind of 'eh'. 6/10

Double Chalupa Box: Yooo this was good. It randomly came with chips and queso instead of cinnamon twists, and the chips tasted really bad and fishy (I didn't eat them) but the queso was great for me, just like movie theater cheese product (note: probably not great to most people). The crunchy taco was your typical crunchy taco and the chalupa (beef) was great -- maybe too much sour cream on it but otherwise quite good. Like a taco inside in a soft fried(?) shell. Hello gluttony! It's your girl! 8/10

Steak Quesarito Combo: Haha. This is so bad for you, but it tasted very good. The combo is a hard taco (good, solid) and a drink (who cares) with the tasty tasty steak quesarito - a quesdilla rolled up like a burrito. Inside is rice, cheese goo, spicy creamy sauce, maybe sour cream, and odd flay/jerkyish steak bits. The taste is very good. But the afterbuzz is...less so. 7/10

Cheesy Roll Up: This looked pretty tragic, but it was better than I thought (for 1$)! The cheese is a mix of white and yellow, like in their quesadillas. It is easy eatin' and pleasant, but nothing special. 6/10

Beefy Fritos Burrito: I don't like fritos, so I should have known that this wouldn't be my favorite. The meat and cheese is good, as usual, but the fritos were weird and soggy. And rice didn't really "go" in my opinion, even though I normally like rice. This is far from my top taco bell item, but if you take the fritos out it is still a good bang for your buck. 5/10

Chips and Pico de Gallo: This was way better than the last time I got chips! They only give you a small portion, which is actually perfect for me. I enjoyed every chip (~10 chips?) and the whole little cup of pico, which is nice and fresh and cilantro-y. Good side dish. 7/10

Shredded Chicken Quesadilla Melt: It's no chicken quesadilla. Somehow this tastes less like the tasty goo in the regular dilla, and more like unspecified fast food glorp. It was only a dollar and it was filling, but not my fav item either. 6/10

Chips and Guacamole: Uh oh, this is no Chipotle level guac, that's for sure. It was super smooth, somehow sweet, and way too tart. Not what you want in a guac. If it weren't a veg, I'd throw it out. The chips were good but the guac was bad. 5/10

Chips and Nacho Cheese Sauce: Wow OK, this was actually really good! Definitely the best of the "chips and" crew. The chips were in fine form, and the cheese was just enough and like perfect movie theater nacho cheese. Warm and a tiny bit spicy. Love this stuff. 8/10

Chicken Quesadilla Combo: This is good, my favorite quesadilla along with a solid crispy beef taco (no beans or sour cream!). Also comes with drink with I split with my boyf. A tasty journey, but you feel a bit bloated afterwards, you know? 7/10

Loaded Taco Grande Burrito: I picked this out myself to go with chips and cheese. It was only 1 dollar, and had red tortilla strips in it that I hoped would be like fiery doritos shell, but they weren't. Just tasted like regular soggy shell bits. The rest is sour cream (but just a little), tomato, lettuce, and beef, but it didn't real super loaded. Just a little, which was nice. Unfortunately I was in quarantine at the time and can't really enjoy it because of that. 7/10 

Soft Taco Supreme: I didn't get the combo because I wasn't hungry enough, but I got two of these without sour cream (for my sensitive boyf). They were good! Soft shell, taco beef, lots of lettuce, nice tomato. I don't love the cheddar cheese but it's OK. 8/10

Note: with sour cream added, they are even better! Tacos are good. 9/10

Crunchy Taco: My boyf ordered too many tacos so I ate this for him. It's no soft taco. The shell is so tasteless, no spice or even salt. Blech. The inside is great though, beef and lettuce (and tepid cheese). It's OK but I would never pick it out on my own. 6/10

Pineapple Whip Freeze: I got this with a combo for an upcharge of 80 cents, and they gave me a Large which is too big! But I was glad to finally try this. IDK if I definitely got the "whip", but there were vague white spotches at the bottom of the cup (but only just). Anyway, even if it's just a pineapple icee that melts really fast, I liked it. It tastes just like the brown/yellow swirled slushies I (aka my dad) would get from Sheetz when I was a kid. Definitely bad for you, not super cold, a lot of syrup, kind of Tangy?? like a coke slushy but more pineappley. I wish it had more whip, I think. But it was good and made me smile even though a smaller size is better. 8/10

Grilled Cheese Burrito: Good God, it's another item I ate (half of) that my boyf foolishly ordered! Even though I didn't eat the whole thing, I regreted it deeply. It was so filling/dense, but I don't like the spicy chipotle sauce that they use. Not because it is too spicy, but because it is too mayo/ranch-y. Like the one at Jersey Mike's. I will say that the shell with the cheese on it is good. Without the chipotle sauce it would be decadent for sure. 5/10

Cinnamon Twists: These were honestly better than I remember, even though most other dessert items are still superior. These are just a light, crunchy bag of cinnamon-sugar coated dough. A fun little treat and less likely to give you regrets than the cinnabon balls -- but also way less tasty. 6/10

 

Baja Blast Mountain Dew: People love this stuff, but I don't quite get the hype, though I was never a soda lover in general. It mostly tastes like blue raspberry liquid suspended in a small amount of Mountain Dew regular. It's OK. 6/10

 

Crunchy Taco Supreme: My well-intentioned boyf ordered me this on a solo TB run. It is not my favorite taco, as you may know, dear readers -- I am a soft taco girl. Honestly, Taco Bell's crunchy tacos are just much worse than anything you can get in a tortilla or a bowl and that's all I can notice. The shell has bad texture, bad flavor, and is hard to eat!! But at least these had sour cream, which makes them a tiny bit better than the plain crunchy taco... I guess. 6/10

Quesalupa: Yeaaah buddy. This is a chalupa (fried dough shell) with cheese on it. The cheese was sadly not at all melty, but the shell is still so good and fatty. I got this with chicken which I didn't know was an option, and I think that was very good. Some heartburn upon eating (no surprise) but very tasty. 7/10

Overall
Cost: 9/10
Taste: 8/10

Q says: It's fine. 6/10

Lucerne - Provolone Slices

This was alright, although much like my recently reviewed meats, it wasn't my favorite iteration of a sliced cheese. To be honest, it might be one of my least favorite iterations! But it was cheap enough and had plenty of slices that didn't go bad or dry or anything unseemly like that. So it was fine. Would I rather have some deli cheese, of course. Would I rather have Kraft singles, maybe I would. But it was fine.





Overall
Cost: 5/10 [2.50$ish]
Taste: 5/10

Hormel Natural Choice Cooked Deli Ham

As far as deli ham goes, this one isn't great. Definitely not as good as the Hillshire Farms honey ham. First of all, this is thicker sliced, but it also seems to have more filler because of that, and is very wet in a gross slippery way. Also not much flavor, ham or otherwise, and certainly no honey flavor (not that it's supposed to, I guess). At least it isn't smoked flavored either. It's OK if you crucially need ham for something, but definitely not my first choice. I got this because it was cheapest (at like 5$, for heaven's sake) and my usual was like 8$ (which is crazy), but I think I might take the hit to my wallet in the future and get a better ham.


Overall
Cost: 4/10 [5.50$ish]
Taste: 5/10

Hormel Natural Choice Uncured Hard Salami

This tastes like salami, so that's good. But it's not great salami. I mean, I'm not a huge connoisseur of the stuff anyway, but I've had meat and cheese trays, and Italian subs, and sweet bologna, and those all had better tasting meat than this. Still, it serves the purpose of being a slightly spicy oily meat circle, not very sweet and quite thin. You do get like 15 slices or something, which is plenty. I got this because it was the only option in the store, so I guess it worked fine for my needs. Might consider a meat + cheese tray if I just wanted a salami snack though.



Overall
Cost: 3/10 (Like 6$)
Taste: 6/10

Liscio's No-Point Rolls - 12 pack

These came in a bag of 12 rolls in my Acme bakery. I got it because it had an ingredients list with no nuts, but it wasn't store-bought crap white bread, you know? But unfortunately these were terrible, texture-wise: so so so chewy and hard to eat. The taste is fine, totally unremarkable, but the texture was a killer. They also aren't perforated so you have to rip into them like an animal. But today I had a revelation: I can toast the rolls if I rip them just right. Toasting is a saving grace and bumps these up to useable, even useable in a decent sandwich. Nice work, toaster!

Overall
Cost: 5/10 (5$ for 12 rolls that expire in 2 days)
Taste: 5/10

Frico Lambrusco NV

OK y'all, let me be real with you. I was not supposed to drink this today. It didn't come up in my random sample rotation. Today is kettle chips (already reviewed; they're fine). But I didn't drink all week, and it was Thanksgiving, so I had a long, lonely weekend. My partner was off with his family! My family was off with the neighbors! My friends were traveling! So I wanted a little wine, sue me. Also the Dunkin guy told me the cappuccino machine was broken; not sure if he just hates me or if it's true. Anyway this is in cans so it looked fun. I like cans, they are instant portion control (in theory). But what I didn't know? Holy heck, these are also fizzy! Like red wine champagne!!!! Hold the phone, my friends. I don't know much about wine, but I love the fizzy stuff, and it's so rare to get in subscriptions. What a blessing. It's just a little fizz, nothing crazy, but it definitely has that champagne taste I love, even though it's red. It doesn't really taste much like a red. Maybe a little fruitier than normal, which is actually nice. A nice dry sweetness with a little cherry/grape (lol, what I keep calling cherry is probably grape, but whatever) flavor profile. It's great. I want to drink all the cans!

Overall
Cost: 6/10 (18$ for 3 cans)
Taste: 8/10

Starbucks - Bottled Peppermint Mocha

This is fine! I just tried to burn some smudge because it's a full moon and I got some as a free sample, but it smells like someone smoking pot and it's grossing me out. Just feels toxic. If only I could vape smudge instead. How's this for a chatty intro? Anyway, I feel like that might be lowering my rating because my house smells bad and it's probably impacting my tastebuds.

Dunkin doesn't have peppermint mocha as a christmas flavor this year, so people are very upset! I decided to try this bottled drink because I do like minty flavors. Like other bottled coffee drinks, though, this is more like chocolate milk than coffee. There's really not much coffee flavor, or much mint either, just mocha and milk. (I mean, it is a latte). It's definitely fine, and a pleasant wintery drink, and the mint presence is there, I just would rather have a real coffee. For some pluses, there's no awful bottle/can aftertaste here like with the metal cans, and it also isn't overpoweringly sweet either. Good job, Starbucks! Not terrible!

Overall
Cost: 5/10 (I think about 2-3$, a bit much)
Taste: 6/10

Signature Kitchens Spring Vegetable Mix

I didn't really want to eat these, but I didn't eat any veg all day, so I made them just on their own with a little Goya seasoning. It's OK, but they're really wet. There's a lot of green beans and yellow squash in here. I wish instead of onion, there was corn or cauliflower. But it's a decent mix; it's hard to find a veggie mix other than plain brocco without beans or peas in it, so I'm happy this exists. It's a good mix in for the Parmesan noodle pack, and probably others. 120 cals for the whole bag, and is a good 2 noodle pack servings.



Overall
Cost: 7/10 (On sale for 1$)
Taste: 6/10

Mrs. T's Mozzarella, Tomato & Basil Pierogies

Honestly, I had very low expectations for this flavor of pierogie, because they look a little gross. Why is it red inside? Is this ravioli or pierogie?!? (Of course ravioli is more delicious....) But I like mozz, tomato, and basil, so even when they're mixed with mashed potato and pepper inside of a noodle, the taste is still good. It really is like an italian pasta inside, just mixed with potato. I don't LOVE it, but these are so cheap and easy to make that I'm gonna keep playing the pierogie roulette.



Overall
Cost: 7/10
Taste: 7/10

Maruchan Bowl - Chicken flavor

Yep, this tastes like Maruchan ramen all right! They really all taste pretty similar to me, whether it's a bowl or a packet or a cup or whatever. This is a big portion, and it's easy to prepare. It has a lot of water and it isn't as salty as the yakisoba. I think it tastes a little less good because of that, but also probably would give less stomachaches. It's making me a little itchy right now even though there are no nuts or peas in it, so I'm not loving that. If I die, I change my rating to a 1.




Overall
Cost: 8/10 (1$ or less)
Taste: 5/10

Knorr Pasta Sides - Parmesan

I am so shocked that I haven't reviewed this before! It's one of the holy trinity of tasty and accessible classic pasta sides (with garlic and cheddar brocco). I recently peeped this in the store and saw the noodles changed to be white only, which makes me very nervous, but hopefully Knorr isn't going through too many changes right now. I always get nostalgic about the Lipton Days, the Nacho Pasta days, the Knorr with Veggies days. But I see there are now "deluxe" pasta sides, which is interesting. I think that will be a review for another day.

Anyway, this is classic. The noodles are thin, so it cooks quickly, but not as fragile as the alfredo/butter/chicken noodles, I guess because of the thick spinach pasta? The taste is good, it's parmy and spinachy and creamy but not overwhelming in any way, and not as strong of a flavor as the garlic pasta. It's a good conduit for veg (frozen mixed veg, fresh spinach, brocco, you name it) and a nice side dish for chicken or pork. Just a simple classic, and you can find it easily.

Overall
Cost: 7/10 [Usually 1.25 or so]
Taste: 8/10

Grounded Snacks - Cinnamon Sugar Red Rice & Quinoa Tortilla Chips

A tortilla chip that isn't made from corn is a pretty cool concept, now that I think about it. The fact that these are all organic/non-GMO whatever and made out of quinoa, I thought maybe they'd be super healthy (not so) or taste really unique (not so). But these are a decent sweet snack. They're just standard tortilla chips without a strong corn flavor, with a nice dusting of cinnamon sugar. Good crunch, nice brown color, and not too savory (I don't like those sweet/savory mixes). I wouldn't ever really seek this out, but it's totally fine and enjoyable enough to snack on (I went through almost all of it watching some late night Grey's Anatomy).


Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10

Vinaccio Bianco, NV

This is a white wine, so I expected a little sweetness and less tannins! I got the less tannins but it's not really very sweet at all. This is my first "grillo" variety so maybe that's just how they are. The flavor is just OK for me, kind of like a sour champagne but with no sweetness. It's not very acidic, though, which I do like. Plus the bottle is cute, even though it's really lacking in information (who made this? when? where?) and it had a cursed cork. I wisely drank it over 2 nights, so no hangovers here.

I made this with the suggested enchiladas, only I used precooked chicken instead of seitan+raisins (since I'm allergic to soy). It was really filling, and lasted me several meals, but I think I'd rather have had tacos or fajitas or quesadillas in flour tortillas with white cheese and fresh veg. Basically the enchiladas were kind of a dud for me (5/10 perhaps), but I don't think it was my fault. I know you didn't come here for my enchilada review, but listen, the wines are paired with foods and that's how it's gonna be.

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10

Halfpops - Sea Salt

These were really not what I expected! I assumed this would basically taste like popcorn, but it didn't at all. Instead, it had a strong nutty flavor! Of course there are no nuts, just corn, oil, and salt, but I guess corn tastes like nuts when un-popped(???). The texture was also very very firm/hard/crunchy, which added to the effect.  The flavor wasn't buttery at all, either. It was a little salty, I guess, which is good, and reminded me a little of the snack mix that has a ton of rye chips in it. So the flavor and texture didn't really do it for me, I'm afraid. I did enjoy reading the label prose, there was a lot of it and it was wholesome and not offensive, which still being cute and hipstery. So that's a plus.



Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 5/10

One Potato Two Potato - Plain Jaynes Sweet Potato Chips

Talk about an unwieldy brand name! It's so long. The name "Plain Jaynes" is a little weird, too, because my friend Jane hates being called Plain. But the bag art is pretty unique and cute. I wasn't sure what to think going in. It turned out these were really good chips! There's only three ingredients, and the oil is sunflower oil, yet these reminded me strongly of coconut chips (i.e. coconut pieces). Maybe that means there was a lot of oil + the sweet and salty combo, I don't know, but it was tasty. I like the sweet/salty combo, and I liked the thickness of these, which were fairly thin and therefore easy to bite and enjoyable. Basically these were a snack food that actually tasted good, like an indulgence, and they have vitamin A in them too! Score! The other potato flavors look pretty great too (onion, BBQ, maple?!?!) so I hope I get to try them in the future. I've never seen these in a store yet.

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 7/10

Deep River Zesty Jalapeno Chips

I got these as a snack from Bryn Mawr's cafe, because I'm scared of all their other food and my office hours make my non-eating hours way too long. This is a big bag (300 cals = 2 normal mini chip bags) which I definitely appreciate. I remember liking this brand, but I guess this particular flavor didn't really do it for me. They are super super firm chips, very crispy, but awkward to eat in public because they're so firm. I also didn't love the taste; they're definitely spicy but it's mainly just spice and no sweetness or other fun flavors to match that. I'll have to try another flavor next time.




Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 5/10

Lean Cuisine Margherita Pizza

This was all I had to eat today and it was so not enough; I feel like my stomach is eating itself but my parents are here judging me so I can't eat anything else. Therefore I don't recommend this. But it was super quick to cook, the cheese did manage to melt fully, and I don't have any heartburn (so far), so that's good. It didn't crisp up at all, so really we're looking at a bit of soggy cheesy bread with bits of tomato, which could surely be worse but was a bit lacking in flavor (no basil or real mozzo flavor). Also, mine was square and the picture is round, so that's a bit odd. This was on sale, so maybe they're about to change it up. I hope so, because some of LC's other pizzas aren't too bad.

Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 6/10

2018 Balance Chenin Blanc

Look at how cute this bottle is! It's a balloon and an elephant! I love it. If all South African wines have such cute labels, I don't know what the online ratings are about (they seem like they're low). Anyway, I was happy to have some white wine, since it goes down much easier for me. This seemed like a pretty standard white in that sense; I put two grapes in the bottom of each glass for a fun sangria-like experience. Bad news, though, I drank the whole bottle in one night and woke up feeling like hot garbage, ready to vom at any moment. Whoopsy. So that put me off a bit, I was between 6 and 7 in rating and the bad hangover is pulling me to 6. Sorry for my lack of self-control, Balance.


Overall
Cost: 6/10 [10$?]
Taste: 6/10

Brothers All Natural Fruit Crisps - Strawberries

These were nice! Unlike the previous Brothers fruit crisps, this bag felt a little bigger (2 whole servings of fruit, they say) and therefore a bit more satisfying. The only ingredient is strawberry, which is cool. I like strawberries so I like this, even though freeze drying takes away the best best of fruit (the juice!). It's something sweet and pleasant to eat, and tastes like dry strawberry. The pieces were pretty small, but I think that's because strawberries are small. No real complaints about the product, it just has a maximum goodness level and they basically hit it here.




Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10

Bagel Bites - Three Cheese

Bagel bites! What could be greater, than playing a game of golf with a bagel?

These are truly classic, although they really aren't that good, they are certainly better than pizza rolls. I think one flaw in my process is that I make them in the microwave, so they are chewy and sometimes cold, which obviously is not great. Otherwise, they have a nice mild flavor and are cutely bite sized, so you can eat 9 whole pizzas if you want to (I usually do). The ones with meat are really bad because the meat tastes weird, but the plain cheese is alright. A crowd pleaser for picky eaters.

Overall
Cost: 5/10 [4$]
Taste: 7/10

Mighty Spark Jalapeno & Honey Chicken Snack Stick

This was pretty good! My biggest issue with snacky meat sticks is usually the texture, but I thought the texture of these was great - not too chewy or dry (or wet) or anything like that, just a nice pliable meat bite. It did contain some kind of odd crisp bits (I guess bits of jalepeno?) that threw me off, but I still liked the texture overall. The taste was also pleasant; it's a little sweet and a little spicy, and tastes kind of like a chicken street taco. So, a good experience, and overall satisfying especially for only 60 cals. Plus, very portable and also nut-free!




Overall
Cost: 5/10 [About 1.70 per stick]
Taste: 8/10

2015 Elicio Red Blend

Generally, I prefer white wine (or rosé or sparkling or beer or liquor...) to red wine, because red is So Tannin-y (or acidic/bitter/heavy however you want to say it). Plus it stains your teeth. But it's generally thought to be better for your health, and also less sweet and more classy, so I still drink it. Also this is supposed to pair well with a nice cottage pie I'm gonna make shortly, so we'll see. Enough blather, friends! This is from Rhoneland in France, and it even has a twist-off cap, which I love to see. The first sip was pleasantly fruity, and yes, still bitter, but it came along with a pleasant sweetness and zero bits of cork. The bottle also looks classy, so I'm a fan.



Overall
Cost: 4/10
Taste: 7/10

Original Sixlets

A nut-free logo makes sixlets a likeable company, and the stupid little glasses caterpillar is also endearing to me. But honestly these don't taste that good to me ("I've had better"), even though I tragically don't have many other normal chocolate candy options (basically hershey-ettes at christmas). The reason these aren't great is that they're really malty. The orbs are cute, the candy coating is good, the size and everything is good, the only negative for me is the taste of the chocolate...which is a pretty big negative. It's really sweet, not creamy/milky, and very malty. Tastes like whoppers but with no crunchy bit. I appreciate that they kept the taste the same over the years, and I am vaguely nostalgic about them, but I still don't like them that much.

Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 6/10

2016 Nexo Rioja

Whew, this is a "high tannin" wine! AKA it feels really....dry? My wine terminology isn't quite up to snuff. Also, I'm still sick, but listen, we gotta live our lives at some point, you know? Anyway, I made the recommended ricotta toasts with garlic greens yesterday (they were good), but I'm too full to actually pair them with the wine. So who knows how the pairing goes down. But the wine is good, it's fine. At first I was hesitant to enjoy this wine, because it is fairly sharp(?) but it's also got a nice fruitiness to it, like cherry maybe. And that's with the sniffles! I also got a little cork in there by accident, but I don't think I can taste the difference. Anyway, this is a nice wine. The more I sip it, the more I like it - but I'm only having 1 glass tonight! Because I'm sick! Still, I look forward to tomorrow. And the tree on the bottle is super cute. And Chance the Rapper is pretty good paired with this.

Overall
Cost: 5/10 [18$]
Taste: 6/10

Chewy Sixlets Fruity Flavored Candies

I had no idea sixlets made a fruity version! That's fun, although the appeal of sixlets is really that they're like an allergy-friendly version of M&Ms (but not quite, since they're round and malty and not really the same at all). Anyway, a new candy is always fun. And these are so pretty, with shiny opaque coating. Unfortunately, I ate these in the middle of being sick, which meant that I couldn't taste them and also that eating so much sugar almost definitely made me get even sicker, whoops. So, I really don't know what these tasted like, although the different colors did seem to correspond to different flavors (and I think I liked red best). I thought the texture was good, they were very chewy and juicy, and the coating was a nice solid exterior that didn't melt or anything weird. They seemed very sweet, and I don't know if the flavor was weird or good. Since I've never ever seen these in a store, though, I don't think it really matters!

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10 (?)
Intrigue: 8/10

MadeGood Granola Minis (Chocolate Banana)

Just like with the strawberry flavor I recently had, these were disappointingly dry and crumbly! I don't get it, because the first flavor I tried was so perfect. Maybe it's just rose-colored glasses. Anyway, these still had a good flavor and are convenient, I just wish they were moister and chewier. They could be truly great!

Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10

Idahoan Four Cheese Mashed Potatoes

So, I've had the flu this week (still do, bleh) and when I ate this, I was at the apex of sickness (or at least I hope so) and therefore couldn't really taste them enough to give an accurate review. From what I could perceive, they were not amazing but they were fine. I still paired them with brocco and they were still suuuuper filling for the calories. I think I liked the original flavor better, although it's hard to tell what I really thought of these. I hate bleu cheese, so the fact that that is one of the included cheeses makes me nervous, although I couldn't tell it was included. But maybe if I had control of my senses I would have noticed and disliked it. Anyway, this company seems pretty cool - they have a lot of products, everything is cheap, and they have a nice website with allergy info and recipes and pictures. I'm on board.

Overall
Cost: 9/10
Taste: 6/10

Idahoan Classic Mashed Potatoes

I wasn't sure what to except with these, as I find plain potatoes a little boring, and people talk crap on box (or bag) mashed potatoes. But actually, I thought these were really good, especially for the price and convenience factor. The taste was nice and buttery, with a nice creamy texture, and overall a fun experience. They were super easy to make, and I paired it with brocco for a full mean. I ate them all! But it was still less calories than a noodle pack, woohoo.






Overall
Cost: 9/10 [1$]
Taste: 7/10

DiGiorno pizzeria thin Margherita pizza

Why do people like DiGiorno so much? It's such an inferior product to me! And so calorific! Anyway, this was fine. It just has tomatoes, cheese, and weird basil specks (not full leaves at all). It gave me heartburn after just a little, but what doesn't these days. In general it was inoffensive, it was fine, it's still pizza.






Overall
Cost: 4/10
Taste: 6/10

Bigelow Vanilla Chai Black Tea

I'm more of a coffee drinker than a tea-toter, but when I'm sick I prefer tea, so it's good to try some every now and again. Plus, I need the sweet caffeine any way I can get it! This stuff was fine; not super flavorful even though I steeped it forever, just vaguely spicy and warm. That's pleasant enough though, and I like that they actually list the ingredients, so I know there's no allergy issue.



Overall
Cost: 7/10
Taste: 5/10

Lean Cuisine Tuscan-Style Vegetable Lasagna

I was excited for this because I love lasagna and also veggies. But this was quite bad. It wasn't an offensive taste, per se, it was just no taste. Tasted like wet nothing. There were no distinctive flavors, from the sauce to the veg to the cheese. Just food product. At least it was low-calorie nothing with veg in it, so things could be worse, but I'd rather have a salad.




Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 4/10

Airheads

Airheads! What a classic and unique candy. These are nut-free, even with the little X-thru-a-peanut symbol on the packaging, so I'm predisposed to like them. Plus you get 5 individually wrapped bars here, so you can save them for however many servings you like, which is nice (I'd recommend 5). The flavors are fairly distinct, I think cherry is my favorite and blue (just blue) is my least favorite, as it's the sweetest with the least nuance. (I'm not sure what the White Mystery flavor is supposed to be - it tasted kind of like a mix of all of them, like a dumdum, and a cursory Google reveals that to be the case! Mine mostly was cherry flavored, which I like.) But there's not a ton of nuance to be found in all, they are mostly just firm rectangles of sugar with a weird gritty (hehe, gritty) texture. Very sweet and almost like gum that slowly dissolves and then you're like "did I eat gum?". So...yeah! Not the greatest candy in the world, but at least it's safe. :D?

Grape flavor: I'm kinda surprised this wasn't included in the 5-bar pack, it seems like grape is usually a base edition flavor! I also usually don't like the grape flavored candy (see: jolly rancher, popsicles, skittles), but I enjoyed this one.  It wasn't overly sweet like some of the other flavors, but still had a nice strong grape flavor, like a sweet candied juice. I enjoyed it. 7/10

Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 5/10