Marie Callender's Steak & Roasted Potatoes

Surprisingly decent/comforting, although there was a slightly disconcerting amount of butter onion goo included with those green beanos. The onion crispies were also not at all crispy (perils of the microwave meal, I suppose). Overall this tasted good and was warm, although it's never something that I'll crave (most likely). But it was solid, it was fine. No objections.




Overall
Cost: 7/10 (On sale for 2.50)
Taste: 7/10

Valentino's Café

Can you believe it??????? I didn't think I'd ever really go here, but it happened for me, everyone. And it was pretty, pretty...fine. There wasn't anyone in the dining room part of the building which was a little weird, and the whole "seat yourself" vibe always throws me off, but there's also a certain local charm to that. The menu is mainly burger, sandwich, and spaghetto, and that's fine by me. They also have some breakfast stuff but it's only before 10.30am, and like, that's a rare thing. Anyway, the drinks are super cheap (1.50 Yuengling? 5$ pitcher?!?) but they also brought out the wrong bottle one time so it's win some lose some. I got ravioli and spaghetti and garlic bread and I thought it was pretty good. The sauce was meaty but not in an itchy way. The ravioli were what you want in a ravioli. The pasta was eh (a little floppy/thin) but the bread and sauce and company and price was good. I would totally go back if I could convince my boyf.

Overall
Cost: 7/10
Taste: 7/10

Q says "ugh, at least it's close. 4/10"

Marie Callender's Creamy Parmesan Chicken Pot Pie

So, this had a very nice taste, creamy pot-pie flavor and all. But it also made me feel itchy and weird, even though there's no peas inside. Plus, it's like 1000 calories. So the taste isn't worth the trouble.

Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 6/10

Ben & Jerry's Chillin' the Roast Truffles

I love coffee and truffles so I was pretty AMPed for this one. The ice cream base is a nice, smooth coffee flavor. It has little flecks in it like vanilla bean and tastes great. The fudge swirls, where they happen, are good and taste like....fudge swirls. However! The "truffles" are a super-duper strong rum(?) flavor, which is very bitter and actually not good! They also look like chocolate covered orbs of nut butter, which freaked me out. But they aren't, they're bitter rum coffee death orbs instead! I wish it was just cookie dough or something. Somehow I felt like a badass for choking them down, but I'd rather be a meek mill cookie dough eater. There were fun textures and a really nice coffee flavor overall though.


Overall
Cost: 4/10 (5$! I thought it was 3$ but my store lied on the sign)
Taste: 6/10

Cold-Brew High Brew Coffee - Double Espresso

This is one of the better pre-made coffee can/bottles I've had. At first sip, it's real watery, but that's because I've grown used to the terrible milky-ness of your starbucks&etc bottled drinks. This is mainly water, coffee, with just a little milk and sugar. But it's cold (or room temperature in my case), with no ice, so it's a little unusual for someone used to that Dunkin life. This plus is that this is super convenient -- I always like thin stylin' cans. And it's only 50 calories! The taste is a pleasant bitter coffee, but smooth, and not acidic. There is a bit of an aftertaste (metal? milk+metal? I don't really know what it is, but all the can coffees have it), but it's not as unpleasant as the other canned coffees I've had. Overall - this is nice.

Overall
Cost: 5/10 (2.50$ at the store seems a bit much, I'll just buy coffee coffee)
Taste: 6/10

InnovAsian General Tso's Chicken

This is really good. It's basically the chicken from their chicken with broccoli meal, but with none of the filler broccoli (although you could make some on your own for that healthy touch!). You need to make some white rice to go with this and then you're a happy camper. The only downside is that it's about 1600 calories without rice, and even though I only use about half the sauce packet, that's not great. I want to eat it all myself, but splitting it into 2 meals is really the best approach. The sauce, by the way, smells not great, but once it's cooked and mixed in, it's very nice, just a little hot/spicy with a light sweetness. The chicken pieces are super processed, like chicken nuggets, but in the sauce they taste good enough that you don't notice. For someone with very few premade Chinese food options, this is the best of those options (other than the chicken and broc from this company).

Overall
Cost: 4/10 (About 5$ at Wal-Mart, 7-8$ elsewhere)
Taste: 8/10

Jelly Belly Assorted Flavors

This was such a tiiiiiny package -- it only had like 7 jelly beans in it! I guess it's a good sign for Jelly Belly that I wanted more, more, more!

There was a time, years ago, when Jelly Belly had a peanut (butter?) flavored jelly bean, and you could make lots of fun fruit combos with it. But somehow an angel fell to Jelly Belly headquarters and made them get rid of it, and now they are a peanut/tree-nut-free facility. How nice. To be honest, I don't like the flavor or texture of these as much as "regular" big grocery store easter jelly beans, but these are fun because there are so many different flavors! They are all just a little too sweet and too chewy to be perfect, but some flavors are really nice. For instance: lemon, pineapple, cherry, root beer, everything that isn't licorice.... So there's fun to be had, picking at random, and no fear! This is a good way to slow down your eating of sweets and really savor the experience, which is just a good habit to get into in general, I guess. So I'm a fan.

Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 7/10

Fini Shock Tongues

A candy brand I've never tried! That's because it's a Spanish company, and it looks like their products are new to the US. Possibly because of that, I wasn't able to find any allergy info or warnings anywhere, either. But it looks like all the candy they offer in the US version is gummy or fruit candy, no nuts, so I figured it was safe (and the ingredient statement didn't warn of anything).

Anyway, I wasn't sure what to expect. This is a quite colorful package, with 6 different fruit flavor "tongues". They were all pretty good, and they all had accurate flavor in my opinion (the watermelon was the strongest!). The sour note is pretty subtle, but that doesn't mean they're too too sweet, just a nice level of sweet and sour. They are chewy and pliable, but not crazy chewy or sticky or soft (or hard). A fairly unique texture but I liked it. Like gum but it isn't gum! I'm a fan.

Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 7/10

Pepperidge Farm Soft Baked - Santa Cruz Oatmeal Raisin Cookies

I have a note on my computer that says "No buying bagged cookies!" but I guess I willfully disregarded it when I picked these up at Walgreens. Sometimes you just want sweets, you know?! The problem is that these are 130 calories per cookie, and there are 8 cookies, which is realistically 2 servings of cookies, which is like 500 calorie servings of cookies, which means you'll get a stomach ache and also feel bad about yourself. If you operate like I do. Which you probably don't.

Anyway the taste is decent. The size is a nice-sized round chewy cookie, with plenty of raisins. It's a little TOO chewy/wet for my liking, and also too sweet(!) for my preference too. But it's still a good big cookie without nuts that is certainly more appealing than your oreo-chips-ahoy options. For someone who can't eat bakery food and doesn't want to bake cookies every night, this is a good pick.

Overall
Cost: 5/10 (about 3$)
Taste: 7/10

Goya Plantain Chips - Original

I thought these would be like the thicker tostones Goya makes, but no! These are way thinner, like a normal potato chip, and are basically chip-like in all ways (although maybe yucca-chip like, not potato). They are slightly more fun  than a regular chip because of the cute built-in banana design, but the taste is just so-so for me. Very bland and a little nutty, and not that much salt. I do think they're better than the too-thick tostones though.






Overall
Cost: 7/10 (2$ for a 5oz bag)
Taste: 5/10

Amazin' Raisin - Strawberry

These are much better than the lemon flavor! The strawberry is somehow less intense or less overpoweringly sweet, so I didn't get as sick of these (though they still taste better one at a time rather than in huge handfulls). The strawberry flavor is like a strawberry candy or a strawberry gummy or fruit snack, not necessarily a real strawberry, but that's fine with me because these are raisins. Honestly I'd rather just eat strawberries, because raisins are not my favorite snack (so sticky, so sweet), but these are kind of a cute idea and this flavor was definitely a better pick than lemon was. Who knows, maybe some of the others are even better (though I can't imagine cinnamon is any good at all).



Overall
Cost: 7/10
Taste: 6/10

Good Health Kettle Chips with Olive Oil - Sea Salt & Vinegar

These were fine! As a brand, I like these chips; they're firm and crunchy without being oily or crumbly or anything undesirable. Salt and vinegar isn't my favoooorite flavor, but it's better than just salt, and it's kind of fun to have that sour vinegar vibe. Especially as the weather gets warm! This was a pleasant spring snack with just a little bit of a zing, overall a mild flavor. I'm not sure if the olive oil adds anything special beyond your typical vegetable oil, but I get the sense that it's secretly better for you, so I guess that's nice. I think it's cute that the oil (olive, avocado, others???) gets top billing over the flavor with these chips, since it's such a non-entity in the flavor department, but there you go!


Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10

Angie's Boom Chicka Pop Cheddar Cheese Popcorn

This is a fun brand; most of their popcorns are safe (just not the creative sweet ones, sniff sniff). I like the opaque packaging, and I generally like cheddar popcorn, so this was nice. I liked that it was yellow-orange powder (like the bag) and not weirdly floral white cheddar powder like some popcorns have. The texture was good and the cheese powder tasted like cheese powder. It's not earthshattering, but it did the job. A nice tasty snack that isn't too regrettable. (It is messy for your hands though! Don't meet new people without a little washup first.)




Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 6/10

Dunkin' Donuts Espresso Iced Coffee

As you might know from my 30 page long Dunkin' Donuts proper entry, I'm a big DD loyalist. I love them despite their sometimes crappy food and service, because they have good allergy info and cheap prices and an app. But this is not that. This is the "Dunkin' at Home" line of pre-bottled drinks. Still, I went for it because of the branding, even though I kind of suspected I wouldn't love it. This is OK, but it's so so milky? and sweet and not like coffee (or iced coffee) at all. Just like Nesquick or something. The espresso flavor doesn't seem that different from the other flavors, it's just a general milky coffee liquid. But it is convenient and has caffeine, so I can't hate it, it just doesn't taste that good to me. Sorry Dunks, try again later.



Overall
Cost: 5/10 (About 2$)
Taste: 5/10

Food Should Taste Good - Sweet Potato Tortilla Chips

I do agree that food should taste good. Too bad these chips were shockingly average!! Sick burn!!!!

I like sweet potato chips a lot, so I was hoping for that slightly sweet/salty vibe, but the first and prominent ingredient here is corn. These are basically corn tortilla chips with an orange hue. They are very crunchy and if you want tortilla chips I guess they are fine and probably good for dipping since they are quite firm. However, I am not a huge fan of tortilla chip so I'm not a fan of these. I like the stylish packaging but I find the name a little misleading! Needs more sweet potato.


Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 5/10

Stouffer's Five Cheese Lasagna

It's hard to dislike any pasta/noodle/lasagna, and this one is nice because it's under 400 calories but not even from a low-fat frozen meal line. So it tastes good but unlike frozen pot pie, doesn't make you feel like a giant trash can. Always a plus. This also is meat-free, which normally I wouldn't care, but a lot of lasagna "meat" is a little funky for me and honestly doesn't taste great. So this is actually a nice, successful lasagna. It wasn't amazing, it's mostly 2/3 noodles with some watery sauce and what seems like watery ricotta, but it got the job done. There was also some delightful mozz on the top, but only on the top, and I wish there were more! I guess that's how they keep those cals down.

Anyway, I mentioned 2 cheeses....what are the other 3?? Maybe there's parmesan mixed in with the ricotta or sauce, but what else? Let's peep the ingredos. Apparently asiago and romano. OK, if you say so, guys. I hope you know there's no shame in being a 3-cheese lasagna.

Overall
Cost: 6/10 (On sale for 2.50!)
Taste: 7/10

Amazin' Raisin - Sour Lemon

I like lemons and I like raisins, but I don't think combining the two did anyone any flavors. These are raisins infused with lemon juice. Cute idea, and they did have a strong lemon flavor, but also were super sweet and sticky (you know, like raisins). Overall I found it a little strange and I actually wish the bag didn't have so many raisins in it because I was sick of it by the end. I'd rather have dried lemon bits for sure. On the plus side, this is allergy friendly, and it's original (I guess).

Overall
Cost: 7/10 (about 1$)
Taste: 5/10

Marie Callender's Chicken Corn Chowder Pot Pie

You thought I was done with MC frozen meals, but surprise! There was one more hiding in the back! As with the rest of these 16oz pot pies, it's randomly over 1000 calories, even though cals = 460 and servings per box = 2. So dumb. But disregarding the absurd in more than one way calorie info, this pie was nice. I think I actually liked it better than all the other MC pot pies, even though I saved it for secret last because I thought it would be the worst. It contains only chicken, very pale white corn, possibly a few potato chunks, and sauce with occasional bacon crumbles in it. And lots of crust. The chicken was nice and didn't make me itch, the corn was nice, the sauce was nice although I didn't love the bacon, and I was sad there was no celery but I think it would have made the texture weird and inconsistent, so maybe I'm not sad at all. This is obviously very filling, and although I think it could do with less crust, it tasted good, solid, creamy, and warm. Not sure why the cream sauce was better than the chicken/beef sauce, but it was!

Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 7/10

McDonald's

Eww, right? Who eats McDo's?! As a kiddo, it was by far my least favorite fast food place, mainly because they put chopped up onions on all their burgers and I thought that was gross. I also think the 3-bun Big Mac concept is terrible. But now I'm a little chilled out, PLUS they have breakfast all day, PLUS they have a vanilla ice cream cone with no nuts. Mmm, soft serve, so rare for nut allergy sufferers! So I've come around, and on a road trip or a lazy day, I'm A-OK with a little allergy-menu-having McDos.

I like their apple pie, vanilla cone, egg mcmuff, and way too creamy iced coffee. Hot coffee is standard/fine too.

I tried recently the Pico Guacamole Buttermilk Crispy Chicken, because it had guac and I wanted some veg. It gave me mad heartburn, but otherwise it was filling and fine. I think it'd be better with no cheese and no ranch sauce. So maybe a plain chicken sandwich would have been better. 5/10

I also tried the Southwest Salad with Grilled Chicken, and even though it had little black beans I had to pick out, the dressing/chicken/strips/corn was good and refreshing (and healthy-ish!). The only downside was that it made me make eating noises and also smell bad and my boyf was perturbed and now I'm neurotic about eating this salad. But it's good though. :D? 6/10

Cheeseburger: McDonald's is gross and this burger was gross too. It was only a dollar though. But it has onions which make me vom and are so small they're impossible to remove, the burger is gross, and the bun is pretty good. 4/10

Buttermilk Crispy Chicken Sandwich: This was a crispy chicken sandwich and it didn't make me gag, so I guess it was fine. About 650 calos for a weird fake-looking shiny bun, vaguely buttery crispy chicken, small tomato, tiny lettuce, and massive gorp of mayo. But it was OK. 6/10

Quarter Pounder with Cheese: When will I learn that I hate McDo's burgers? I got this without onions because I thought I just hated little onions, but the burger still tasted the same gross way! It's like the onions are inside the patty! Or whatever bad thing is in there, maybe it's not even onion at all.  But it's truly terrible. The burger patty is the McDo's downfall. 3/10

Grilled Chicken Sandwich: This was devoid of any flavor and it was over 5 bucks. Yet it was only 380 calories, and fairly filling. It didn't have any mayo (or sauce at all), yet somehow it wasn't too dry. A weird product, but could have been worse. 6/10

Hash Brown: Don't understand the love for hash brown. Plain Mcmuff is better choice, this is oily and not great. 5/10

Bacon Smokehouse Artisan Grilled Chicken: Mistakes were made; I got this because it's chicken and not beef, and I like onions and BBQ and bacon, but the mustard made this weird, it could have used lettuce/tomato, way more BBQ and overall just wasn't a good mix for me, even though none of the parts were truly heinous. 4/10

Iced French Vanilla Coffee: This was difficult, because ordering it got us a "Sugar Free Vanilla Coffee" instead, which was freakin' gross. Second try, we learned just "Vanilla Coffee" (don't say french) is the way to go. Anyway, this is a solid way-too-creamy/sugary coffee, but it tastes good and not artificial or metallic or anything. A little like what I imagine milk is like for people who drink milk. Got a medium and it was more than enough, 'cause they don't put that much ice in. 6/10

Iced Latte: G-dang, McDonalds coffee is so difficult. I ordered plain iced latte (medium), no modifications or swirls or sugars. But it was SO PAINFULLY SWEET. Wtf. Full disclosure though, I got this via delivery (no issues there), and it was in a little cup inside of a bag lol. Very weird and cozy. No straw! I mean, it tasted like a sweet treat, but that's not what I wanted. Sigh. 5/10

McChicken: McChicken is a cute name for a sandwich. This was actually not bad; it was only 1 dollar and yet was filling and satisfying. It's just chicken/mayo/lettuce, and it could use more lettuce and less mayo, and maybe the addition of tomato or cheese or something would improve it, but it's still decent. 6/10

Pumpkin and Cream Pie: This isn't even on their online menu, but you can find the ingredients if you Google for it. And it's safe! And so good, this was awesome. It doesn't look like much but the inside is basically pumpkin pie filling and cream cheese. This is great. Spicy (in the pie way) and sweet. 8/10

McRib: Ah, the cultural zeitgeist! Top of the morning to you, Mr. McRib. I think I basically agree with the general sentiment on this sandwich: it's not bad, but not amazing. The first bite impressed me a lot; I thought it really did taste like rib insides. But then it became more bread/pickle/onion/general food-like substance. Not bad though, and the ingredients don't have any weird fillers (or legumes!). Good but not really great either. 7/10

Blueberry Muffin: So disappointing! I was so hype for the purported nut-free bakery additions since the Dunkin muffins are now may-contains. But while the top was good and moist/sweet, the rest was not sugary or wet or good, and the whole thing had kind of a chemical flavor. I like that the berries are real blueberries, but they didn't taste like it -- they tasted just like the artificial ones from my 99 cent muffin mix. Ultimately a letdown. 5/10

Hamburger (+Happy Meal): This Happy Meal came with apples, a toy, a little milk, a little fries, and a hamburger. Not bad, McDos. I was expecting to hate Hamburger as I have hated all Burger from McDos, but honestly it wasn't bad. Maybe I was just really hungry, maybe they're different now? maybe I got a good one? But the bun was nice and buttery, the meat was meat, and the onions and pickle were edible since they were focused in just one spot in the middle. Not very filling, but pretty tasty/fine. 6/10

Deluxe Crispy Chicken Sandwich: So McDo's added 3 new chicken sandwiches to compete with the Popeye's / Chik-Fil-Trash hype. Sadly, I tried this one first, and I thought it was kind of a dud. The bun was nice and buttery, but the chicken itself had a weirdly fishy/old oil taste. It really threw me. The lettuce/mayo/tomato really did not add anything, either. Maybe I just got a bad patty. 5/10

Honest Kids® Appley Ever After® Organic Juice Drink: I got this with a Cheeseburger Happy Meal, which again, is way more lit than I used to find it. This Apple Juice itself was also fun! It was not sweet at all, which is really different from any apple juice I've ever experienced, but I thought it was pretty tasty and also healthy. Very cute stuff. 7/10

Spicy Crispy Chicken Sandwich: The second of the three new chicken sandwiches, and sadly I won't be trying the third since these buns apparently have pea protein in 'em now (wtf). It was alright while it lasted, though -- really spicy to me, but much better than the deluxe sandwich. The chicken and bun were good (but really spicy), the sauce was just OK. 7/10

Double Cheeseburger: Again, honestly this was pretty satisfying. I still don't love the onion bits, but the pickle/ketchup/cheese is good, the meat is fine, the bun is fine. It's filling and it's fine. 7/10

 

Sprite: On the one hand, Sprite is Sprite, and it's not very good. On the other hand, I didn't like this version much. I've had better fast food sodas. Partly Sprite is to blame, but dare I say, McDos is not the best iteration of Sprite I've had this year. 5/10
 

McDouble: The name is good, good branding. But the burger was kind of dry, I still don't like the little onions on here, and even though this was edible and safe, it was honestly not very enjoyable. 5/10

Overall
Cost: 8/10, fast food is great for this (just avoid combos)
Taste: 5/10

Q says: It seems like the renovation has been bad for it. Later: This was a different McDonalds.

La Tortilla Factory Hand Made Style Tortillas, White Corn & Wheat

Is this "La Tortilla" or LA Tortilla? A classic question. These are very opaque tortillas. I guess that's what I associate with corn tortillas, like at CalTort -- they feel thicker/stronger than flour ones. But these are 50/50 corn and flour, which is cool in concept, even though in practice they feel more like corn ones to me - shiny and thick. The concept of corn tortillas has really grown on me over the past few years, though, so I'm not opposed to it. These are a nice size, not too big or too small, and you get 8 of them in a nice resealable bag. I used them for tacos, and it was fine. They didn't break or do anything wacky. Good job, tortillas.




Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10

Nothing but the Fruit Real Fruit Bites - Mixed Berry

These are little cubes of fruit leather/snack/bar/puree. I think the cube shape was an inspired choice, as these are way more fun than a bar style fruit snack. Similar texture, but small! These had a heavy grape flavor; I didn't really notice the apple or the other berries much. Maybe a little blueberry. It was a nice flavor though, a pleasant little snack, and fairly healthy too. I'd be down to try other offerings from this company for sure.






Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 7/10