These are new, and they are weird. The taste is essentially the same as OG Starburst, but the texture is really different. I suppose like a marshmallow or a firm gummy snack. Consequently they are less "juicy" and also less sweet than a normal starburst. So I think they're better to eat, especially if you want a bunch of them.
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 7/10
These guys make Texas Toast AND stale texas toast!? Wow. Anyway, much like the fresh version, I thought these were mostly fine. Very garlicy/salty, and a little bit big/firm for my preference, but overall good. Definitely serve their purpose in a salad and don't seem to contain nuts. Hooray!
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 7/10
Usually chip seasoning is a good thing, but this is the rare case where I prefer the plain salt version. There's lots of seasoning here, but it's weirdly sweet and has a strange undernote. Addictive in a way, but I switch between "yuck" and "yum" from bite to bite. Weird. No thanks.
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10
Somehow knowing this was the last of the terrible pies made it a little better. I will never buy these again, but this was less bad because I have no expectation for what a strawberry cream hand pie should be like, so the weird thin goop filling wasn't as upsetting, even though it was certainly fruitless thin goop. Crust was fine. These are better cold than hot, but they are still bad. :(
Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 6/10
These were quite good, at least on first opening! Thick, firm bite with a good amount of salt (=not too much). Restaurant quality instead of weird tostitos quality. They do sog up a bit after opening, though -- I need a better storage method, perhaps.
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 8/10
Curse the day I decided to buy these pies! Luckily there's only one left after this. Whew. OK, so the inside texture is still freakin' weird and goopy (and thin). It did taste a lot like a boston creme donut filling+frosting, though. Didn't really go with the pie crust. Overall, filling and fatty and sugary, and not worth it. Weird stuff.
Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 6/10
Continuing along with our pie-rade of horrors, this, too, was bad. The outside is basically what I want in a hand pie, but the inside was really bad and weird. Like silly putty, but lemon colored. Yikes.
Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 5/10
JJs Bakery is one of the biggest letdowns of my adult life. Dang. I was really hoping apple would magically be good, and I even heated this one up, but it was no good. Tasted less like anything, but still very disappointing. Hardly any (goopy, weird) filling, no apple chunks to speak of, just real bad.
Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 5/10
They didn't have restaurant style at the store, so I thought I'd try this one. It's very runny, which I thought I'd like, but the lack of chunks makes it pretty boring. Basically this tastes like nothing, but a little sweet (which is a negative). Oh well. Not actively bad, just not good either.
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 5/10
I haven't had grate(!) luck with grated parm and my digestive system. This is a legit company, but yet I still felt pretty funky after eating this, even though it was fresh! I couldn't really taste it much, so I have little to offer other than it didn't kill me and they sure put too much in these containers.
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10
Yes! Yes!! I love pasta, but this is definitely one of my favorite shapes. Get this: it's thick spaghetti, but with a hole in it. Whaaaat?! It makes for a fun experience, almost like a thick lo mein (or chow mein?) noodle. Good if you're bored of mundane spaghett. Unfortunately, it is very easy to undercook, so account for a little extra time methinks.
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 7/10
I have no idea when or where I drank this, or even if it was safe (lol), but apparently I thought it was a really nice light spicy pumpkin beer, per a cryptic note to myself. Fair enough! I'm getting excited for fall aka less sun aka pumpkin season, anyway.
Overall
Cost: ?/10
Taste: 8/10
Similar to the 2019 variety, this was a nice classic red! I guess I'm a merlot girl in the end. Nothing crazy going on, but it was solid and drinkable (although may have given me a headache!). I paired it with the One Pot Pasta, which was better than I expected but not amazing. Better as leftovers, maybe, just like this wine!
Overall
Cost: 5/10 [17$]
Taste: 7/10
This is a good wine egg. It gave me more grape than cherry, but still a nice bright classic red wine flavor. Better cold, I think. Couldn't make the suggested sandwich happen, but this is much better than the crappy Qdoba meal I paired with it, that's for sure!
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 7/10
I'd say these are OK. They taste like tea for sure, meaning that they make my throat feel a lil funny. It's gritty, you know? Coats the throat like red wine. I got a little citrus vibe here, even though this is just plain (i.e. not the 'lady' version with citrus!). I guess caffeine and a quick steep is good.
Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 5/10
Ah, I went to buy my usual Philly cream cheese and I saw they have a pecan flavor, which freaked me out about cross-contam, so I got this store brand instead since they didn't have a visible nut flavor. I should really send Philly an email! Anyway, this served its purpose and didn't kill me, so mission accomplished. It was a bit different in color (lighter) and chunkiness (more?!) but the taste was quite close and I had no issues with it. I just have a general anti-store-brand policy due to nut fear.
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10
Just like the port wine flavor, this tastes basically identical to the handi-snacks cheese, which isn't really that good, is it? But I love spready cheese. It looks like they only use almonds on their cheese balls, too. It's fun and spreads well. All about the texture for me.
Overall
Cost: 4/10 [6$!]
Taste: 7/10
Not sure what to say about these; much like the tomato paste, they served their purpose with no ill effects. I think I got the flavored (with garlic et al) ones in the past and perhaps liked them more(?) but these don't have any added sugar and those did. Anyway, nothing special but nothing problematic, too!
Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 6/10
Ah, this is not as good as the one with corn in it, and it also is way too much to eat in one serving, but they didn't have the little ones at the store! As far as this flavor goes, it was indeed spicy, and far too smooth and salty for my liking. But it's better than the plain one because at least there's spice. It's no Chipotle guac though!
Overall
Cost: 4/10 [over 6$!]
Taste: 6/10
This was undeniably "fine". It feels weird and a bit desperate to review tomato paste, but you never know if one might have a secret weirdness to it. This did not. It was standard in all ways I could see; tomato paste in general is really not for nibbling (too intense!) but only for cooking, so it didn't seem to upset the pasta sauce apple cart too much. All you can hope for.
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 5/10
Aw, it'd been a while since I had one of these! This is a new flavor to me, but really, they're all pretty similar. As always, it was filling and easy. This one did have weirdly chewy meat bits, though. The taste was definitely "breakfast burrito filling", which I liked, but the texture was pretty weird.
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10
Oh no. They say "Real Fruit Filling", but the vibe I got was "real toxic filling" instead. I was so excited for these pies because I've been yearning for a Hostess Fruit Pie for the longest time, but you know the allergy info is sus for those. So this wasn't a great dupe. The crust is pretty good, heavy and glazed (maybe too heavy). But the inside was "eh" at best. Not wet or full of fruit, more like a congealed jam. Luckily I was ravenous when I ate this, but in retrospect, it was not great.
Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 6/10
These are really quite good! Definitely a top tier fruit snack. They do taste strongly of mango, which is a top fruit for me, they have that nice pliable texture, and they're represented by a cute raccoon. Just wish there were more little stix in the bag!
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 8/10
This was fine. No major issues, pops well and no nuts that I know of. The taste isn't very salty or buttery, but it does leave a weird fake butter film on your tongue. So, I don't like that. Makes you feel kinda bad without tasting good. Filling, though! Would eat only if no other popcorns or snacks were around, I think. Sorry Pauly.
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 5/10
Yo, I don't know what it is -- I used to like Swedish Fish, I think! But they taste so weird to me now. Like, weird floral chemical vibes. Plus the mineral oil. I'm sorry, Sweden, your fish are bad.
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 4/10
Don't get me wrong, I like the design and easy-to-eatness of all the Bowery lettuce packages, but of those, this is one of my least favorites. It tasted pretty "earthy", if you know what I mean. I know there's no dirt on it, it looks clean, yet it tastes like there might be some dirt on it. The frilly leafs aren't for me, I guess! Still ate it though.
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 5/10
This is a cute bottle, and interestingly it's different from the 2018 version -- that one had a screw top, this one has a beer bottle top! Possibly the actual wine tastes different, too, but it's been so long that I can't be too sure. This one was also quite fizzy, so I guess that's intentional! Kind of fun to have a fizzy non-champ white, and it's a bit sweet, so what's not to like? But after a day or two it really degrades, and so do I, into a vommy mess, so drink this one early and often! :)
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 6/10
I'm not sure why I'm so surprised by this, since they're called "Grahams", but these taste like Teddy Grahams!! Nice! Much better than the savory goldfish, in my opinion. A nice sweet, light frosting taste. Pleasant, like little shortbread cookies. Cute.
Overall
Cost: 5/10
Taste: 7/10
Good things about goldfish: the shape, the jingle, the company. Bad things: the taste! Sorry, goldfish. OK, these aren't bad exactly, but they aren't doing anything for me. I was hoping the flavor blast would blast a little harder, because they seem essentially flavorless. Fairly filling portion size in a snack bag, and not offensive, but the whole "cheddar cracker" vibe is so boring. I don't get the appeal!
Overall
Cost: 6/10
Taste: 6/10
